Infidelity does not mean that the love is gone or never existed. The reality is that you can love someone and still cheat on them. In fact, many affairs happen in relationships that are otherwise very happy.
For many individuals, it is hard to think that a relationship can survive infidelity and part of the healing process involves reflecting on what occurred and why. Most importantly, relationships can survive infidelity when both parties are willing to work together on healing and move forward in the relationship.
Inherent Selfishness/Entitlement. Some cheaters, despite loving their partner and enjoying their relationship, feel they deserve more. Rather than seeing their vow of fidelity as a sacrifice made to and for their relationship, they view it as something to be worked around.
Couples can and do overcome and bounce back after infidelity, sometimes with renewed passion. But moving past cheating and staying together with a cheating partner is possible if you meet the main criterion: confront and deal with your own unresolved issues.
People who cheat are likely impulsive and destructive at decision making. Instead of thinking about you and what happens to the relationship after cheating, they go based on what they want right now. Impulsiveness can be seen in other areas of the relationship, too. So keep an eye out.
Know That You Aren't a Bad Person
"Cheating is a very serious thing. It's a very big deal, and you should take the time to really sift through all of those feelings and reactions you're having," said Gloria. "At the same time, you also need to recognize that this doesn't make you a categorically terrible person.
Here's what we do know about the prevalence of cheating. A 2021 survey by Health Testing Centers polled 441 people and reported: a little over 46% of respondents in a monogamous relationship said they had affairs. nearly 24% of marriages affected by infidelity reported staying together.
In a Gallup poll, researchers noted that more than half of partners say they would leave their spouse and get a divorce if they found out their spouse was having an affair. About 31% of married partners would stick it out and not divorce a cheating partner.
According to the General Social Survey, men are more likely to cheat than women, with 20% of men and 13% of women reporting having sex with someone other than their partner while still married.
According to a study conducted by psychologist Dr. Shirley Glass, only about 25% of relationships that began as affairs actually end up lasting.
Infidelity does not mean that the love is gone or never existed. The reality is that you can love someone and still cheat on them. In fact, many affairs happen in relationships that are otherwise very happy.
How Many Couples Stay Together After an Affair? In one study, researchers found that with instances of secret infidelity, only about 20% of couples were still married after 5 years. However, for couples who revealed infidelity, that percentage jumped to 57%.
One, almost every soulmate union is subject to the possibility of temptation and cheating. The difference is how you communicate and integrate your life around each other. Two, cheating does not always occur with a partner who is unhappy or no longer loves you.
Ruth said if you cheat once, regret it, and are happy in your relationship, you shouldn't tell your partner. If you had a one-time indiscretion and ended up cheating on your partner, chances are you have at least a bit of guilt. That doesn't necessarily mean you should tell your partner about what happened.
If your relationship survives infidelity, the chances of that happening are much greater if you disclose it to your partner. Since an affair is often a result of bigger, underlying issues in the relationship, admitting it to your partner provides an opportunity for those issues to be resolved.
Realize forgiveness isn't a linear process: your partner may want to forgive you, but healing from your infidelity will likely take time. Don't expect your partner to forgive and immediately move on.
Guilt. It is normal to feel guilty about what you've done after cheating on someone. Guilt is a sign that you understand that what you did was wrong and that you have hurt your partner. Guilt can be a difficult emotion to feel, but it can encourage you to find a way to make things right.
Both sexes forgive similarly
Despite experiencing the different types of infidelity differently, men and women are about equally willing to forgive their partner. And the new findings show that the degree of forgiveness is not related to the type of infidelity.
In surveys of individuals who have cheated, falling out of love, seeking variety, and feeling neglected were the most commonly cited reasons, followed by situational forces, a desire to raise self-esteem, and anger with a partner.
This includes actions that cross a partner's boundaries, for example flirting – even when the guilty party has no intention of straying outside of the relationship.
Psychology Today defines it as follows: “Micro-cheating involves actions or behaviours by your partner that make you question their emotional or physical commitment to your relationship. These can include actions like regularly texting someone they find attractive or obsessively liking their social media posts.”
According to estimates based on married couples, approximately 25% of men admit to cheating on their spouse at some point, while around 15% of women admit to the same. Another study found that up to 4% of married individuals had cheated on their spouse in the past year.