Depending on their emotional state at the time of your conversation, your manager may become immediately upset, or even furious that you are resigning. They may feel a sense of betrayal, as well as anxiety about how they will manage the workload without you.
The best-case scenario—and honestly, the most common reaction—is that your boss will accept your resignation with understanding and sincere congratulations. Your manager will be happy to see that you're advancing your career and moving on to something bigger and better.
Loss of your skills. Occasionally, a manager might react poorly because they want you to stay in your position. You may have skills and experience they find valuable for performance or efficiency, and the idea of replacing you is inconvenient.
And, bosses all too often take quitting quite personally. Many bosses will interpret quitting as you abandoning them. In fact, many of my clients have experienced this very occurrence and find it quite traumatic.
A recent survey showed that 80 percent of Great Resignation quitters regret their decision. Though many people left for better work-life balance and mental health, only about half of respondents were satisfied with these things in their new roles.
“I recently learned about this term called quiet quitting, where you're not outright quitting your job but you're quitting the idea of going above and beyond,” Khan says. “You're still performing your duties, but you're no longer subscribing to the hustle-culture mentality that work has to be your life.
Let me be clear: No, it is NOT selfish to quit your job for any reason. You are a free agent. You get to make the decisions that make the most sense for your career and your life, regardless of how that impacts others.
Assuming you manage your departure gracefully, you absolutely shouldn't feel guilty. But guilt is a natural feeling that many people have when leaving an employer, especially if the company's been great to you. And even though you shouldn't feel bad, our brains are great at coming up with reasons that you should.
Feeling guilty about leaving a job is a totally normal reaction. It shows how much you care about the people impacted by your decisions, and how much you're invested. That's a strong reflection of your values.
Many professionals have a strong resistance to leaving a job that's not working out. Quitting is hard because it carries an implication that you gave up, did not try hard enough, or were not good enough to make it work.
A common reason good employees leave is due to inefficient or unskilled management. All employees want others to hear and value their opinions, and they can become frustrated if their managers or company leaders are not open to their input.
This is totally normal. If you haven't been working for an utterly awful company in a completely miserable job, you're probably going to feel a lot of emotions about leaving—even if it's the 100% right move for you. Change can be hard, and it has a tendency to produce nostalgic feelings.
Tell close colleagues in person.
It's fine to email or message most people you've worked with. However, have a personal conversation with any co-workers you're close to. This is especially important if your departure is going to have a significant impact on their working life.
Leaving a job that is harmful can be a traumatic experience, and it's important to process that carefully so that you can move forward to better opportunities. Keep things in perspective as you move forward, and be gentle with yourself, remembering that your job does not determine your value as a person.
A mixture of fear and exhilaration
This is probably the most common reaction to the decision to resign. Essentially this is a mixture of the excitement and anticipation that comes with the thought of a better future or career and the fear that you are leaving behind the familiarity of the old job.
Whatever the reason, you may find yourself ready to leave and preparing to look for new opportunities. If the role or the company isn't right for you for, there's no shame in that. Quitting is okay. But it shouldn't be a decision made lightly.
If you like what you do most of the time – and know you're good at it – stay put. Your resume will look worse for quitting. Leaving a job before you've been there for an entire year almost always looks bad on your resume. Great resumes also don't show several years spent bouncing from job to job.
Sometimes there are steps you can take to improve a job—even one you really dislike. But often, if you truly hate your job, you might need to quit. Even when you hate your job, and are eager to quit, it's important to leave your job on good terms with your employer and coworkers, if possible.
Pay discrepancies are one of the leading causes of quiet quitting. The issue isn't that employees don't want to do the extra work but don't feel appropriately compensated for their efforts. More than money, the root of the problem is a lack of respect.
Twenty-one percent of workers are 'quiet quitting,' choosing to put in only the bare minimum and just doing what they are paid to do. Additionally, 5% say they actually do less than what's required of them.
Provide a basic explanation for your decision
Be sure to avoid negativity regarding your current company and instead focus on the potential for the future. For example, rather than saying "I felt like I couldn't grow here," say "I've decided to pursue a role in which I feel I can flourish," instead.
Pro tip: Tell your boss that you're quitting your job before you tell your co-workers. If you tell peers first and your boss hears that you're leaving from someone else, “your boss is going to feel sidelined and disrespected, which could undermine your ability to get a good reference,” says Yeager.
Once you've said, “I quit,” it's time to tell them why. It's best to really cleanly list out your decision for leaving. It could also be a good time for constructive feedback, especially if your manager asks for any feedback in the conversation.