Can you wear jeans to a funeral? The most common answer is that jeans aren't considered appropriate funeral etiquette unless requested by the family. However, dark, unembellished jeans paired with a shirt, tie, and blazer for men or a blouse and a blazer for women can be appropriate for a casual service.
Avoid dressing in casual clothing, such as athletic wear, tank tops, or shorts. Skip the flip-flops, tennis shoes, sneakers, or boat shoes. Remove the neon necktie, purse, or accessory. Shy away from wearing jeans, even black ones, because they are considered too casual for a funeral.
First and foremost, dress appropriately. This means no jeans, shorts, or tank tops. Instead, opt for dark, conservative clothing. Women should avoid wearing anything too revealing or flashy, and men should make sure their clothing is clean and wrinkle-free.
Boys at an Informal Funeral
Boys can also wear dark colored or black jeans. Light blue, gray, or any other colors should be avoided. Sneakers are okay as long as they are new looking and darker colored. It's still not considered polite etiquette for boys to wear bright colored athletic sneakers to any sort of funeral.
Jeans, t-shirts, and baseball caps are not appropriate attire for a wake. It's also important to remember that hats should not be worn inside the funeral home during a wake or funeral. This is a sign of respect for the deceased and their family, as well as those in attendance.
Dark or muted dresses are traditional and don't take attention away from the service. Shoulders should be covered in most cases. Skirts and dresses should reach the knee. Suits are also considered respectful and appropriate.
We recommend wearing dark or neutral colors, because darker colors reflect the mourning atmosphere of the service or visitation. Clothing can be formal (think suits and dresses) or casual (pants or nice jeans and shirts).
Teens may require guidance concerning what to wear, she added. “Let them know there's a certain way to dress that expresses respect and that means no dirty jeans and flip-flops,” she said. “You may not need a fancy suit, but it should be something clean and presentable.”
For a traditional, formal setting, young boys and teens can wear slacks and a suit. This doesn't need to be black, but it should be in a neutral color. For a less formal event, they can wear dress pants in a neutral shade like black, gray, navy, or khaki.
However, we recommend sticking to the rules of funeral suits for your pants. Black, gray or navy should be your first choices. Brown or tan colored pants are okay, if this is your only option, and preferably worn with a dark colored sport coat. Keep your shoes dark and dressy.
You Don't Have To Wear Black
However, colors like dark grey, dark blue, darker green, white, and beige can be appropriate. If you don't own any black clothing, you may always opt for a subtle hue that is appropriate for formal settings. In addition, stay away from anything with distracting patterns or prints.
Do you have to wear black to a funeral? In short, no. When it comes to knowing what to wear to a funeral that's not black, there are an array of alternatives that men and women can wear. Although black is the most traditional of colors, smart and dark clothing is also acceptable.
What colors are appropriate to wear to a funeral? While different cultures have their own mourning colors, you should typically wear black or neutral colors. Avoid wearing bright colors or prints which can be disrespectful and distracting. Black, white, grey, and navy are the best choices.
"Talking or being on your phone during the service is one of the most disrespectful things you could do at a funeral," says Myka Meier, Beaumont Etiquette founder and etiquette expert. It's important to be as present as possible. "Silence your phone, shut off your phone, or even just leave it behind.
While shorts are never appropriate, for men or women, and miniskirts are frowned upon; bare legs are acceptable if your skirt or dress falls to your knee.
At some point in history, a solid portion of the population believed: It was bad luck to wear anything new to the funeral, especially shoes. If rain falls during a funeral procession or if there is thunder during a burial, it's a sign the deceased is destined for heaven.
If you like you can ask your funeral director for their advice. Often families choose not to take babies and children under the age of about 3, as they are concerned that they might be noisy. Children old enough to know what is happening should generally be given the choice to attend and their decision respected.
Wearing a dress that goes to your knees or below is a safe bet. A nice shirt and skirt in dark colors. Shirts that aren't low-cut and that also have some sort of sleeve are usually considered appropriate for funerals. Longer skirts are also more common, usually to the knee or longer.
When it comes to children, their age will dictate what they wear but in general, older children will attend funerals and so, they should also dress smart. Dark, muted colours are best and boys should wear a smart shirt and tie as well as trousers and shoes. Girls can wear a dark dress that is smart and elegant.
The MPA rated Death at a Funeral R for language, drug content and some sexual humor.
Funeral attire for children
Unlike adults, children are not expected to wear black clothing. It's perfectly acceptable for boys to be outfitted in a suit that they wear for weddings and other special occasions, school uniform trousers and shoes can also be a simple choice they feel comfortable wearing.
How do you prepare a child for the death of a family member? Being honest about the situation is one of the best ways to prepare a child. During the conversation, allow your child to process everything and ask questions on their own time. Offer your support and let them know it's ok to have many different emotions.
If they do not want to see jeans, they need to add the disclaimer “no jeans” or set the dress code to Business Professional or Business Formal. If you continue to be uncertain if jeans will be accepted, the easiest solution is to wear khakis or dress trousers.
Should I Wear A Hat to A Funeral? While hats are not a critical element of funeral attire in the United States, dress hats are entirely appropriate and even encouraged in some cultures. For men, fedoras, bowlers, or military caps are often worn into the funeral and then removed as a sign of respect.
"Denim is a thick fabric (unlike your average T-shirt) so you can get away with more wears between washes. We recommend washing after 10 or so wears—or whenever jeans smell stale or unpleasant.