An infidelity is often a selfish act, and its motivation has everything to do with the person who's cheating. We rounded up some common reasons why experts say people cheat.
There are consistent associations between infidelity and each of the Big 5 traits. For example, people who cheat in romantic relationships score higher on Neuroticism, Openness to Experience, and Extraversion. They score lower on Agreeableness and Conscientiousness.
Cheating can be a sign of deep relational issues
A cheater might suffer from extremely low self-esteem and a narcissistic view of seeing things. Some people have a tendency for attention-seeking and once they are satisfied with one person they might go on to another to fulfil their needs and validate themselves.
Being insecure
Another reason why someone might cheat is because they are insecure. "Usually, in this scenario, the partner that wants to cheat is seeking out confirmation of their desirability," Winter told INSIDER. "And they use the reinforcement of a new person to bolster their own self-confidence."
But just as often, cheaters are in reasonably emotionally healthy relationships with people they love, care about, and have no desire to hurt.
The most important thing to remember is what cheating says about a person. They're insecure, impulsive, selfish, and immature. Sometimes, it's a chronic problem that likely won't ever be fixed, just be sure not to ignore the warning signs.
Why do people cheat? A wide variety of factors can bring out some type of affair. A study of 495 people revealed eight key reasons: anger, low self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and circumstance.
Research in the field of infidelity reveals that there are three distinct personality types correlated with a higher likelihood of cheating: sociopaths, narcissists, and lonely hearts.
Cheating
Whether cheating while playing games or infidelity in romantic relationships, all forms are examples of toxic traits that destroy relationships. For instance, infidelity is the most common cause of divorce.
Summary. Micro-cheating involves participating in inappropriate intimate connections with others outside your relationship.
In some cases, it stems from unmet needs in a relationship. Issues like lack of communication, boredom, and personal insecurities can fester when they're not fully addressed. If one partner feels like they're never listened to or respected in their primary relationship, they may look for that in another person.
Cheaters are impulsive, and can't resist taking that risk despite what it might cost them. Cheaters, like bullies, are fueled by power, and drawn to risk. This kind of behavior, however, is a reflection of something deeply rooted inside of them.
Of the three dark personality types, psychopathy was most strongly linked to cheating. These findings appear in the September Journal of Experimental Psychology: Applied.
An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.
Narcissists and sociopaths are notorious for engaging in both emotional and physical infidelity. Not only are narcissists players and pick-up artists in the dating world, they are also serial cheaters in relationships.
Controlling. One of the most dangerous traits of a toxic person is controlling behavior. They may try to restrict you from contacting your friends or family, or limit resources like transportation or access to money to restrict your ability to interact with the world around you.
Research from the past two decades shows that between 20 and 25 percent of married men cheat and between 10 and 15 percent of married women cheat, according to professor Nicholas Wolfinger.
Based on the data, women report the highest rate of infidelity in their 60s, but the rate goes sharply down in their 70s and 80s. Historic data suggests that men have always been more likely to cheat. But in the 1990s, the infidelity rate peaked among men in their 50s.
The term “serial cheater” is a derivation of serial killer… it implies an irrepressible urge to cheat, regardless of the health of a relationship.
Those high on conscientiousness are characterised by being organised, efficient, competent, and self-disciplined, whereas agreeableness is characterised by being trusting and forgiving, altruistic, and modest. The researchers then assessed which reason was the most likely to deter cheating behaviour.
What are the long-term effects of being cheated on? If you've been cheated on, it may take a long time to heal. It can cause you chronic anxiety, post-traumatic stress, depression, and mistrust of others for a long time after the event.