Depression is a risk factor for having an affair. Of course, that doesn't mean that just because someone has depression, he or she will have an affair – not at all.
Depression accentuates a couple's differences and can lead to substance use and infidelity, which exacerbates their problems. Once depression is treated, a marriage can often be saved and even become stronger than before.
Those who cheat for relationship reasons do so because they don't feel satisfied. "Researchers find that partnerships characterized by dissatisfaction, unfulfilling sex, and high conflict are at higher risk for infidelity," she says.
Research in the field of infidelity reveals that there are three distinct personality types correlated with a higher likelihood of cheating: sociopaths, narcissists, and lonely hearts.
Being in a relationship with someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be overwhelming and frustrating. Every relationship has its ups and downs, but BPD symptoms can make typical relationship problems such as cheating and accusations of infidelity worse.
1. How are most affairs discovered? The phone! While there are text message codes that cheating spouses use to avoid getting caught, there is no denying that mobile phones are a danger zone for adulterers.
Probably the most commonly cited cause of infidelity is a sense of emotional disconnection from a partner. The person committing the infidelity will often describe having felt unappreciated, lonely, and sad. These emotions can often lead to the secondary feelings of anger and resentment.
Low sexual and relationship satisfaction, high sexual desire, and lack of love are the most robust predictors of infidelity.
According to psychologists, people with avoidant attachment styles are individuals uncomfortable with intimacy and are therefore more likely to multiply sexual encounters and cheat.
Affairs usually begin with an attraction to someone you know fairly well, someone you spend time with each week — your friends and co-workers.
An affair is generally a sign things aren't right with someone's relationship. Without the necessary skills to heal the issues, a partner may engage in an affair as an ill-equipped way of attempting to have their needs fulfilled – whether these be for intimacy, to feel valued, to experience more sex, and so on.
The most important thing to remember is what cheating says about a person. They're insecure, impulsive, selfish, and immature. Sometimes, it's a chronic problem that likely won't ever be fixed, just be sure not to ignore the warning signs.
They have low self-esteem.
This trait is a known risk factor for cheating, and often for these people, cheating can be a coping mechanism and an attempted means to feel validated, desired and needed.
“It is tempting to wonder, do cheaters suffer more or do their partners? But the fact is that more than the cheater or the spouse, it is the children who suffer the most. The effects of infidelity on children can be long lasting and can alter their entire worldview of relationships,” says Tania.
In short, an inappropriate emotional connection or attachment can be just as dangerous to a relationship as a physical affair. Emotional affairs can often be gateway affairs to other types of infidelity and are just as likely to lead to divorce or a breakup as physical affairs.
Research from the past two decades shows that between 20 and 25 percent of married men cheat and between 10 and 15 percent of married women cheat, according to professor Nicholas Wolfinger.
Inherent Selfishness/Entitlement. Some cheaters, despite loving their partner and enjoying their relationship, feel they deserve more. Rather than seeing their vow of fidelity as a sacrifice made to and for their relationship, they view it as something to be worked around.
* Think affairs happen during the evening, you'd be wrong. Married people are typically home with each other at night, if that suddenly changed it would raise too many red flags. The majority of married people will conduct their affairs in the morning, before work.
Cheaters are more likely to start an affair in September than any other month, according to a new survey.
The data that focused on marriage length found that men and women differ when it comes to an inclination toward infidelity over time. Women are most likely to cheat on their spouse in years 6-10 of their marriage, while men are more likely to cheat after year 11 of their marriage.
For the betrayed spouse, stages of an affair being exposed can involve everything from denial, shock, reflection, depression to finally taking an upward turn.