Despite the problems in relationship skills experienced by many people with Asperger's syndrome, some adults can progress along the relationship continuum and are able to experience romantic and subsequently intimate personal relationships, even becoming a lifelong partner.
But love is an emotion that can be fully experienced by nearly anyone, despite differences in perception, social interaction patterns, or emotional expression. In other words, someone with Asperger's is capable of falling in love. There are, however, some potential challenges both of you could experience along the way.
Aspies tend to express love through practical actions, whereas NTs are more likely to express love through words or symbolic actions.
We generally have a wide 'vocabulary' of expressions of affection but someone with Asperger's syndrome may have a more limited vocabulary and problems with the intensity of expression. One of my adult clients with Asperger's syndrome said, 'We feel and show affection but not often enough and at the wrong intensity. '
While love is expressed and experienced differently from person to person, those with autism are fully capable of forming deep emotional connections. These can include love for their family, friends, romantic partners, or even interests and hobbies.
People with autism may show their love by: sharing their special interest. allowing someone into their space. using alternative forms of communication.
People with autism may get easily attached to people, leading them to become over-friendly.
Autism doesn't affect your sexual development — but by affecting your communication, sensory perceptions, and other areas, it can influence your sexual relationships. Any relationship can encounter hurdles with sex and intimacy, and neurodiverse people may face certain challenges that make sex a sensitive topic.
In marriage, the Aspie often displays great devotion to his partner and is reliable, honest and faithful. 15. In the privacy of their relationship, the NT partner may become physically and emotionally drained, working overtime to keep life on track for both of them.
People with Asperger profiles may not show their feelings in the same way, or to the same extent, as those without. They may manifest feelings less outwardly, or their facial expression might not match what the individual is feeling inside.
I agree that living with an Asperger's person is not easy, but the marriage can be manageable and happy if the two talk about the challenges and work through them. It is only natural for a person with any difficulty to choose someone who complements them to be their partner.
They have a hard time reading verbal and nonverbal cues like body language and facial expressions, and may have trouble making eye contact. They sometimes don't pick up on “how” something was said, only on “what” was said. People with Asperger's may also lack empathy, the ability to understand the feelings of others.
Many people with autism crave intimacy and love. But, they don't know how to achieve it in a romantic relationship. They can feel blind to everyday subtle social cues from their partner. This can cause conflict and hurt feelings.
Asperger's in adults typically causes issues with communication, emotion regulation and interpretation, social interactions, and behavior.
There can be an extreme sensitivity to a particular intensity of touch or touching particular parts of the body. For some people with Asperger's Syndrome, the forms of touch used in social greetings or gestures of affection were perceived as too intense or overwhelming.
Some autistic people might like more 'obvious' forms of flirting like grand gestures, crafting things for someone or writing letters.
Also, the atypical body language of Aspies can be misinterpreted as lack of attention, disrespect or malingering. Some Aspies may avoid eye contact, speak in monotone, or have a meltdown when over‐stimulated or frustrated. Alternatively, some may become calmly analytical when in extreme pain or distress.
Individuals with ASDs commonly have a low frustration tolerance and significant irritability. They may report that they alternate from calm to extreme anger very quickly. There have been several studies that suggest individuals with ASDs have difficulty understanding and interpreting their own emotions.
Some kids on the spectrum feel a constant need for affection because they are not sure when or if the attention will be available. Schedule 5 to 10 minutes every day when you can provide your youngster with undivided attention (i.e., no computer, T.V., cell phones, etc.).
The aversion to touch may be misunderstood as a lack of comfort with affection. Children with autism do experience and express affection – some may simply experience and express it differently than others.
Facial expressions smooth social interactions: A smile may show interest, a frown empathy. People with autism have difficulty making appropriate facial expressions at the right times, according to an analysis of 39 studies1. Instead, they may remain expressionless or produce looks that are difficult to interpret.