Talk to a therapist to work through your emotions, rather than venting to friends or family. While venting is not the way to go, sometimes you need to get a frustrating experience off of your chest. If that's the case, talking to a therapist or a third party you know will stay neutral can be beneficial.
Rime (2009) states that disclosing stress is a coping mechanism. Venting is a 2-way process: the person venting and the person hearing the vent. As a matter of fact, positive venting can reduce stress, but negative venting can lead to heightened stress and physical health concerns.
Proper ventilation keeps the air fresh and healthy indoors. Like the lungs, homes need to be able to breathe to make sure that fresh air comes in and dirty air goes out.
Venting feels great in the moment, but it can actually make you feel worse in the long run. This is because venting can increase your stress and anger rather than reduce them. At the same time, venting doesn't resolve the underlying causes of your stress.
[Venting is a] coping mechanism that allows a person to rationalize and validate their own fears, concerns, worries, dreams and hopes.
While venting can be a natural part of working through our negative emotions, does it become toxic at a certain point? It turns out, it can. And that's when venting becomes trauma dumping — the act of oversharing your emotions in a way that becomes harmful to the other person.
Trauma dumping is defined as unloading traumatic experiences on others without warning or invitation. It's often done to seek validation, attention, or sympathy. While some initial relief may come from dumping your trauma onto someone else, the habit actually does more harm than good.
What is Toxic Venting? Toxic venting feels like an attack on someone's character. Whether you are the one venting, or you're listening to someone else do it, this communication makes the other person out to be “the bad guy.” This type of bad-mouthing becomes an intense form of gossip.
Venting is a healthy and helpful exchange between two people. A healthy venting session occurs when the listener supports the person venting by offering supportive responses, empathy for their situation, and actively listens. Someone who engages in venting is aware of the emotional state of the listener.
Effects of Venting Anger
In some cases, venting can escalate to the point where it causes physical harm to the self, others, or property. Even less destructive forms of venting anger can have consequences, including: Greater feelings of stress and anxiety. Increased negative emotions and moods.
Venting frustrations (anxiety, anger or sorrow) often provides cathartic release. “The immediate feelings of relief derived from such letting go can hardly be overstated,” Seltzer said. He notes how self-expression can elicit much-needed comfort as well.
Most codes use the 1/300 rule for minimum residential attic ventilation recommendations. This means that for every 300 square feet of enclosed attic space, 1 square foot of ventilation is required – with half at the upper portion (exhaust vents) and half in the lower portion (intake vents).
Consider using a journal to express yourself: Journaling can be great for those trying to stop trauma dumping, because it offers another outlet for processing thoughts, feelings, and difficult experiences. Start journaling and use this as an outlet to vent or 'brain dump' when you're feeling overwhelmed.
Support groups, crisis hotlines or warmlines, and talk therapy are places where one can find a listening ear and a safe place to vent. Talk therapy allows you to address whatever is bothering you now and build tools and gain strategies that you can use throughout your life.
Venting is a healthy way to share negative emotions and reduce stress. But with trauma dumping, you overshare in a way that makes the listener feel overwhelmed or ignored.
How does your brain cope with trauma? According to McLaughlin, if the brain registers an overwhelming trauma, then it can essentially block that memory in a process called dissociation -- or detachment from reality.
Is trauma dumping a form of abuse? Most of the time, trauma dumping is not purposefully abusive or manipulative. It's more common for a dumper to be so involved in talking about their traumatic experience that they are unaware of how their story is impacting their listeners.
Category I is negative pressure, non-condensing. Category II is negative pressure, condensing. Category III is positive pressure, non-condensing. Category IV is positive pressure, condensing.
Lastly, it's important to acknowledge that trauma bonding isn't the same as trauma dumping, which is when we overshare overly personal information with friends, family, or strangers. Being a victim of trauma bonding is a state of emergency, not oversharing.
You can offer support and listen to their story, but you should also respect their boundaries. It is okay to feel uncomfortable when someone trauma dumps, and you can gently let the person know that you need to take a step back. You can also offer to find resources or support groups for them.
Intrusive memories
Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the traumatic event. Reliving the traumatic event as if it were happening again (flashbacks) Upsetting dreams or nightmares about the traumatic event. Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the traumatic event.
It is possible, real, and valid to experience PTSD after an abusive relationship. Living in a toxic relationship can take an extreme toll on mental health, and the negative effects of that relationship often last far after a break up.
You might say something like, “I understand how much this hurts,” or “I know this is so hard and how much you've struggled,” before letting them know that you won't be able to help them any further on this issue at the moment because of the stress you feel being in that position.