An emotionally unavailable man can fall in love, but it would take longer than someone who has their emotions in check. The reason is not far-fetched because he wants to be sure that he's not committing his emotions into the hands of someone that would break his trust.
Emotionally unavailable people can certainly fall in love. They just might have a harder time recognizing when it happens and putting their feelings into words. Remember, emotional unavailability often stems from a deeper fear of intimacy or rejection — fears that can complicate someone's experiences with love.
Emotionally unavailable partners often choose physical intimacy over emotional intimacy so as to not have to deal with the messiness, seriousness, or complications that emotions can bring into a relationship.
An emotionally unavailable man doesn't want to commit. At least not until he's truly in love and ready to make that step. You need to give him time, and remember that falling in love and imagining a future with someone doesn't happen overnight.
The main trait that both emotionally unavailable men and women share is their fear of being controlled, especially in a relationship. For men in particular, a consuming fear is “losing” themselves in a relationship.
Most of the time no contact with an emotionally unavailable man or woman works because it gives them the space and the time they need to think about themselves and their relationship. Often dumpers do come back because they have had the time to reflect on their actions and emotions.
Jealousy is about a lot of things, including insecurity, immaturity, and fear. Emotionally unavailable men may experience jealousy more intensely because they bottle up their feelings.
An emotionally unavailable man will also love the fact that you don't seem emotionally invested in him—after all, you're spending time with friends and pursuing your own interests. You don't need to call or text him to tell him what you've been up to—just post pictures or updates on your social media for him to see.
Both Neblett and Gatling agree that if you address someone's emotional unavailability, express how it's affecting you and lead with "I" statements. It's also important to have clear examples of why you think they're emotionally unavailable so that they don't feel ambushed, Neblett emphasizes.
In other words, an emotionally unavailable person may not be able to relate to you, put themselves in your shoes, or consider your feelings when making a decision. This doesn't necessarily mean they don't care about your feelings, but they might not have the emotional capability to identify and honor your needs.
Emotionally unavailable people expect closeness, intimacy, and emotional vulnerability to lead to getting hurt, so they often avoid getting emotional entirely. Your efforts to elicit emotions from them may lead them to pull away or redirect conversations back to you.
“When you meet someone who isn't emotionally available, you may notice that their communication behaviors are inconsistent, they pick and choose when they answer you or don't, wait stretches of time before they text you back, hoping to keep you on the line—and all of these are red flags.”
Being with an emotionally unavailable man is a daily struggle, but whether he breaks it off or you do, he can still miss being with you. When you are in the relationship, it seems he doesn't care enough to work on it – leaving you holding the emotional reins for both of you.
Traumatic childhood experiences or traumas from a past relationship can often prevent people from being emotionally available. Additionally, certain mental health issues can also prevent people from being able to express and process their emotions.
Coping With Emotional Unavailability
It could be situational due to a recent trauma or loss. In this case, it's important to be patient with yourself and give yourself time to process what happened.
An emotionally unavailable man has a difficult time knowing how to engage in the real-stuff conversations. In some instances, he may have some capacity to listen, but is emotionally shutting that part of himself down so that you don't get too close. If that's the case, you will likely feel shut down and alone.
He's emotionally unavailable
Since he's experiencing difficulties understanding what he's feeling, he'll retreat from the situation because this can be a very confusing experience for him. Due to this struggle, he'll pull away, act hot and cold, or not display much affection when things start going well.
Perhaps you consciously want commitment, but deep down you fear true intimacy, losing your sense of self in the relationship, or getting hurt. As a result, it may feel safer to be with someone who is emotionally unavailable, because you know on some level that you don't have to fully commit to the other person.
An emotionally unavailable man who can't love must see his closed-off emotions as a problem and want to make a change. Men do it, and so do women, but not without extensive work. If you are dating or married to an emotionally unavailable man, your best hope is that he sees the problem and seeks help.
When you're dating an emotionally unavailable person, they'll seek your advice. They'll say they find comfort in your arms and your words. They'll let you take the lead, they'll cry on your shoulder, but they won't call you their girlfriend. They won't actually open up.
Signs of fear of intimacy may include: avoiding physical/sexual contact or having an insatiable sexual appetite, difficulty with commitment, history of unstable relationships, low self-esteem, bouts of anger, isolation, difficulty forming close relationships, difficulty sharing feelings, difficulty showing emotion, and ...
He is ready to change for good
Many people ask questions like can emotionally unavailable men fall in love? The answer is yes! They can fall in love when they see the right person. Emotionally unavailable men would be ready to drop all their unhealthy behaviors so that they would not scare their love interest away.
' If not managed with enough care and awareness, being with an emotionally unavailable partner can be damaging, and it leads not only to feelings of loneliness and isolation but can even erode your self-esteem. Therefore, as much as possible, we should learn how to notice when a partner is emotionally unavailable.
Being with an emotionally unavailable man is a daily struggle, but whether he breaks it off or you do, he can still miss being with you. When you are in the relationship, it seems he doesn't care enough to work on it – leaving you holding the emotional reins for both of you.