Summary: Researchers examined the effects of playing hard to get, a mating strategy that is likely to instill a certain degree of uncertainty. In a new study they show that making the chase harder increases a potential mate's desirability.
The researchers discovered that making the chase harder increased a potential mate's desirability. “Playing hard to get makes it seem as if you are more in demand—we call that having higher mate value,” says Harry Reis, a professor of psychology and Dean's Professor in Arts, Sciences & Engineering at Rochester.
In fact, the EPJ study found that both men and women looking for casual sex actually preferred someone with high availability—an easy catch. But for dating or serious relationships, they preferred someone less available, someone harder to get.
Even if a girl is playing hard to get, it still means she's interested in you. And if she is, she'll be sending out subtle signs that she likes you. It can be hard to tell if a girl is flirting, so carefully observe her body language for these common signs of flirting: She's constantly touching you.
"I'd not recommend playing hard to get with a specific person you wish to interest because this may arouse this person's rejection fears and decrease your appeal," Birnbaum says. "Still, expressions of romantic interest should be reciprocal and gradual. Otherwise, they may backfire.
When Does Playing Hard to Get Increase Romantic Attraction? Folk wisdom suggests playing hard to get is an effective strategy in romantic attraction. However, prior research has yielded little support for this belief.
Like women, men want a life partner who will be trustworthy, faithful and reliable. They want a wife who will stand by their side and, considering divorce rates, it's no surprise that dependability would continue to be attractive.
Men prefer a woman who can stay calm and relaxed. Beauty is more than make-up and a fancy haircut. Men find women more attractive when they are neat and clean. Men find women who smell nice, who have clean hair and hydrated skin more attractive than a face perfectly covered in makeup.
Men love women who are thoughtful, caring, loving and kind. A woman who does little things for her man for no other reason other than that she loves him. A woman who makes him smile back whenever she smiles at him. A woman who radiates love and warmth from her heart.
Playing hard to get is an effective strategy for some dating and relationship situations. If a partner is already interested and likes you, posing a challenge can turn up their desire. If they are uncertain and not a little invested, however, it might be best to be more direct and engaging.
In conclusion, if he likes you, he will text you. How guys text you when they like you varies, but some are consistent. For example, a guy will ask many questions about you, text first, compliment you, send emojis, make you laugh, find reasons to talk to you, and give hints for a date.
One study shows that playing hard to get can increase wanting a person, but simultaneously make you dislike them (or, in some cases, just make you feel over all of it in general). Or, it can repel the exact type of person you want to attract.
