You can only delete messages from both sides if you have access to both iMessage accounts. To delete a message from both sides, you'll need to delete it on a device connected to each account.
Deleting messages changes only your own Messages conversations, not those of your recipients.
To unsend an iMessage on iOS 16
Press and hold the message you want to unsend. A Quick Actions menu will appear. Tap Undo Send. Undo Send works up to two minutes after sending.
However, if your Android is using a direct messaging service or emulating iMessage, you may have the chance to unsend the text. Can others see when I unsend or edit messages? Yes, the person you are messaging will get notifications anytime you unsend or edit messages.
When you delete a message in iMessage, it only removes it from your own device and doesn't affect the recipients' devices. They can still see the texts you deleted in their own message threads. In group chats, it's the same scenario; if you delete a message, others can still see it.
Deleting messages on your iPhone from both sides can be a tricky process, but it is possible. Here are some key takeaways to remember: You can only delete messages from both sides if you have access to both iMessage accounts.
All of your deleted text messages can be found in the Messages app. To find your trashed messages, open Messages and tap the Filters option in the top left of your text threads. Here you can filter your text messages by known senders, unread messages and more. However, the option we want is Recently Deleted.
No, when you delete a message on your iPhone, it gets deleted only from your phone. The other person you sent the text to can still see it in the inbox.
Deleting a message:
A Quick Actions menu will appear on your screen. Tap "Undo Send" This feature will only work for two minutes after initially sending the message. The undo action will only work with iMessage texts, meaning that chats with Android users or iPhones via SMS won't have access.
Unsend a message
You can undo a recently sent message for up to two minutes after sending it. Touch and hold the message bubble, then tap Undo Send. A note confirming that you unsent the message appears in both conversation transcripts: yours and your recipient's.
Incorrect settings.
You can go to Settings > Messages > Keep Messages to have a check. If it is not Forever, it is the reason that iPhone deleted all messages.
No notification is sent on their end.
If someone deletes your iMessage, the conversation on your end will remain untampered, and you won't see any sign that they have deleted a particular iMessage or the conversation. However, if the person unsends an iMessage they had sent you, you will notice the action on your end.
The unsend feature only works with iMessage (iPhone to iPhone), and you and the recipient must be running iOS 16. If you unsend a message to someone running an older version of iOS, they'll still see it, and you'll get a notification reminding you of that.
If you can't add or remove someone in a group message
You can only remove someone if the group has four or more people, and everyone is using an Apple device, like an iPhone or iPad. You can only add someone to a group message if they're using an Apple device.
You can restore messages you deleted for up to 30 days. In the Messages conversation list, do one of the following: Tap Edit in the top-left corner, then tap Show Recently Deleted. Tap Filters in the top-left corner, then tap Recently Deleted.
Tap the search bar and input the keyword in the message you are looking for or the contact's name whose chat history you would like to look at. Press the "Search" button on your keyboard to trigger the search. iMessage will scan through all your messages to reveal all the chats with the keywords you are looking for.
Tap the triple-dot menu icon, visible in the upper-right corner of the messages screen. Select the trash bin icon. Choose the conversation you want to recover and select “Restore.”
If you backup or synchronize your phone to iCloud then anybody who has the details for that account, or even has their phone connected to the same account (a family member, for example), could potentially see your personal text messages.
Security
According to Apple, iMessages are secured with end-to-end encryption (this applies to both text-based and media messages). So even if an iMessage is intercepted, it won't be readable or 'crackable' to the scammer. Note, though, that texts to Android devices are NOT encrypted.
That's because the texts are being sent to an ID that is listed as an iMessage receive ID on both devices. See Settings > Messages > Send & Receive > You can be reached by iMessage at: Correct this so each device has a unique ID.