Because of our passionate need for meaningful connection, we INFJs can get jealous easily when we see other people connecting and having fun. We might compare ourselves to them, or worse yet, when someone close to us has friends of their own, we might pull away, feeling unwanted and pathetic.
Because of this desire to keep certain special people close, the INFJ can become unknowingly jealous of that person. This is something that can cause the INFJ to become more possessive than they like or want to admit towards the people they care for the most.
INFJs don't try to make others jealous of anything. If an INFJ is in love with someone who doesn't love them back, the INFJ will remain a “loner” for a bit until they heal. After that's happened, they then continue as they did prior to falling in love - but they're a tad more guarded / protective of their heart now.
INFJs feel insecure when they receive criticism or are faced with conflict or confrontation. They want to live in a harmonious atmosphere as much as possible, and they tend to take criticism very personally as children.
INFJ personalities are often seen as those quiet, sensitive types who are easily upset and seem to take everything personally.
Because of our passionate need for meaningful connection, we INFJs can get jealous easily when we see other people connecting and having fun. We might compare ourselves to them, or worse yet, when someone close to us has friends of their own, we might pull away, feeling unwanted and pathetic.
INFJs keep to themselves.
This can make them hard to get to know, and they are often that one person in the group who's shrouded in mystery. INFJs are also resistant to vulnerability, so even after the conversation is started, the INFJ isn't likely to offer up any meaningful connection right away.
Their perfectionism can drive others away.
INFJs are perfectionists. Their compulsion for perfection can be harmful to the INFJ themselves, but it can also push people away.
INFJs preferring Quality Time and/or Words of Affirmation is also supported by a survey conducted by Heidi Priebe. According to Priebe's survey, 35.67% of INFJs list “Quality Time” as their preferred love language.
INFJs also feel embarrassed when they cry in front of others or react emotionally to criticism. They also experience “second-hand embarrassment”. This occurs when they empathize too strongly with someone who has done something awkward or is embarrassing themselves.
They might get angry and defensive, scared of ever letting another person in. It's okay to feel those things, but it's not healthy to stay there long-term. The heartbreak doesn't have to define the rest of your life and your other relationships (I'm currently working on convincing myself of this).
If you are an INFJ or an INFP personality type, you know it's possible to experience intense attraction with your crushes. In fact, most of the time when you develop a “crush” on someone, it doesn't feel like just a crush. It feels like an obsession.
INFPs and INFJs are commonly confused for one another due to their apparent commitment to sensitivity, forming deep relationships and helping others navigate the world. Though, while INFPs and INFJs may seem similar at first glance, these two personality types possess distinctions which set them apart.
INFJs are Idealists who care about personal growth and bringing the best out in others. This sounds great on paper, but it also means you may idolize people and create unrealistic expectations when it comes to romantic partnerships.
INFJs are empathetic, patient listeners and loyal friends, but they may shut down when others push them too far. The Counselor personality has a cold, closed side, and it can be extremely hard to win them back as a friend when that relationship becomes strained.
When I surveyed INFJs about their flirting styles, more than anything, they expressed a deep desire to connect emotionally with someone they liked. They will be more emotionally open, express more of their deeper longings, and become more vulnerable with you if they like you.
At their best, INFJs make modest, reliable teammates, and allow others to take the lead. INFJs may undervalue their own needs, ideas, and contributions, acting overly shy and not taking credit when due. At their worst, INFJs can be excessively submissive, ineffectual, and too dependent on direction from others.
They tend to dislike last-minute changes and repeated mistakes, which they see as thoughtless or uncaring. At work, INFJs may find it difficult to keep their personal feelings out of their interactions with others. They'll likely become stressed if they feel unappreciated, dismissed, or ignored.
Ni-dominant types (INTJs and INFJs) often need considerable quiet time to themselves to think and focus. Interruptions, noise, and excessive sensory stimulation will push an INFJ to the edge of their comfort zone.
Here are some of the things that make INFJs the angriest:
Rudeness. Having their ideas and insights dismissed or ignored. Lack of empathy.
They'll Get to Know You Deeply
They want to know what motivates you, what your deepest fears are, and what makes you feel most alive. INFJs want to understand you on a soul level and will always be interested in learning more when they love you.
INFJs are fairly sensitive individuals who can be deeply affected by emotional pain. They may have experienced betrayal, rejection, or hurt in the past, which can make it difficult for them to trust others in the future. In many cases, they may hold onto this pain for years to come.