One effective way that a narcissist can draw someone back into their realm is to say, “I love you.” If you're especially important to a narcissist, they'll say and do just about anything to get you back, including using those powerful three words.
They want you to love them.
They may be telling you that they love you because they so desperately want you to love them. This is a part of the love bombing stage of the narcissistic relationship. They want you to feel valued, idealized, and perfect for them so that you will feel the same way about them.
Whether it's concious or unconsious, saying "I Love You" might be a manipulation tactic. It can be used for power,to smooth over mistakes, and keep someone around.
1. They will react with joyful relief. When you tell a narcissist you are in love with them, their initial reaction is joy and relief. This joy, however, is not the result of you two falling in love; rather, it is because they have skillfully seduced you with their charm.
The short answer is a simple “no.” It is actually highly unlikely that your narcissistic partner is even capable of real love, let alone feels it towards you past the beginning of your relationship.
Narcissistic partners usually have difficulty really loving someone else, because they don't truly love themselves. They are so focused on themselves that they cannot really “see” their partner as a separate person. They tend to only see the partner in terms of how they fill their needs (or fail to fill their needs).
So, saying 'I love you' too much, even if you mean and feel it, can come across as insincere. It also puts the hearer under pressure to reciprocate. Sure, they may love you, but they may not be feeling what you're feeling in the moment. They may not feel the need to say it.
Narcissists use sex and the pretence of emotion to control others. They like to be in control, and often derive pleasure from giving or withdrawing sex or affection to this end. 10. Narcissists are not really capable of feeling guilty, and feel no shame about lying if they think that it will get them what they want.
Narcissists pretend to love you because it makes it easier for them to turn you into a viable source of narcissistic supply, chase their own fantasies of the ideal love, and bypass any boundaries that you may have that would prevent them from gaining control over your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and needs.
Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people. Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented. They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves.
Sporadic bursts of interest are arguably the most toxic love language as it leaves us wanting more. Psychologically speaking, it creates cravings for attention BECAUSE we don't know when we're going to receive affection from the other person.
If you are in the infatuation stage of a relationship, it may be best to hold off on saying “I love you.” Infatuation can fade quickly, and you may not feel the same way in a few weeks.
'” In its sarcastic form, “I love that for you” is a prime example of what writer Myriam Gurba calls “the queer art of being mean,” but it's an inherently versatile phrase, one that's as easy to employ sincerely as it is to toss off as an insult.
In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident, and self-assured women. While this may seem counterintuitive, it is important to realize that the narcissistic traits of grandiosity and confidence are really a mask for deep insecurity.
Gaslighting occurs when your partner will purposely challenge your triggers by bringing up situations that they know upset you. They then will accuse you of overacting about the situation even though they knew it would bother you.
“Love bombing” is a phrase describing this stage, in which the narcissistic person may smother the target with praise, courting, intense sex, vacations, promises of a future together, and designation, essentially, as the most special person ever.
They're often introverted, sensitive, and prone to experiencing anxiety and shame. They may also struggle to maintain close friendships as they focus heavily on themselves, require attention, and are hyper-sensitive to perceived criticism.
People with narcissism tend not to like seeing other people happy. When they see you happy, the best thing you can do is to stay firm on your boundaries, focus on the present and what makes you happy, and avoid getting into arguments. They might try to hurt you to disrupt your peace and justify their actions.
Attention-seeking behavior—positive or negative—is essentially narcissistic supply. Wanting attention, accolades, and validation are not inherently narcissistic. We all need to feel heard and accepted, but narcissists crave this attention constantly.
Narcissistic relationships can last anywhere from a few days or weeks to many years. There are anecdotal observations suggesting that the average length of a narcissistic relationship is around six months, but no empirical evidence supports this claim.
Narcissists Will Eventually End Up Friendless and Unpopular, Study Confirms.
Of the five love languages identified by marriage counselor Gary Chapman, Ph. D., perhaps the most misunderstood is the love language of giving gifts.