Narcissists can feel emotional pain, but not usually in the same way as others. The emotional pain they may feel is usually related to underlying selfish needs. Underneath the displays of superiority and sense of entitlement, they often feel empty, powerless, and shameful, which they perceive as weakness.
Underneath their façade is toxic shame, which may be unconscious. Shame makes narcissists feel insecure and inadequate―vulnerable feelings that they must deny to themselves and others. This is one reason that they can't take criticism, responsibility, dissent, or negative feedback even when meant to be constructive.
Narcissistic Vulnerability
Despite having seemingly strong personalities, narcissists are actually very vulnerable. Psychotherapists consider them to be “fragile.” They suffer from profound alienation, emptiness, powerlessness, and lack of meaning.
People with narcissistic personality disorder often have other mental health conditions, particularly mood disorders. They also have a high rate of suicide. These conditions may have a common cause or they may be a result of the difficulties people with narcissistic personality disorder have with social interactions.
Not all people with narcissism are unhappy, but many can't find contentment when they aren't the center of attention. They may seem unhappy or insecure unless they get their way and receive praise. However, when they're not happy, they may do whatever they can to disrupt your happiness.
Someone living with narcissism does cry. They can feel regret, remorse, and sadness. These emotions, however, don't often have roots in empathy. American Psychiatric Association.
But, although agentic grandiose narcissists come across as very confident and satisfied with themselves, some psychologists have suggested that they don't actually feel as good about themselves as they appear.
The researchers found that while many narcissists may perceive themselves as highly intelligent, critical thinkers, they are less likely to use important reflective thinking strategies when solving problems, Therefore, the high levels of confidence they have in their intellectual abilities are often misplaced.
According to research, people with narcissistic personality disorder have reduced gray matter volume in areas of the brain related to empathy and increased activity on baseline images in brain regions associated with self-directed and self-absorbed thinking.
While narcissists perceive themselves to be above average intelligence and strong critical thinkers, they are unable to use reflective thinking skills effectively. The high levels of confidence they have in their intellectual abilities are often misplaced.
Treatment for narcissistic personality disorder is talk therapy, also called psychotherapy. Medicines may be included in your treatment if you have other mental health conditions, such as depression.
“As narcissists do not have empathy, they are not able to genuinely care or love you,” explains Davey. Instead, narcissists will only have people in their lives that benefit them; they are very selfish people. “They are number one in their lives.
When you're in a toxic relationship with a narcissist, it can trigger mind and body trauma, including low self-esteem, panic attacks, and mental illnesses like anxiety and depression. The behaviors of a narcissistic parent are considered child abuse.
Narcissists believe they are unique or “special” and can only be understood by other special people. What's more, they are too good for anything average or ordinary. They only want to associate and be associated with other high-status people, places, and things.
In Study 3, participants' reactions to experiencing a physically painful experience (a cold pressor task) were examined. Results indicated that vulnerable narcissists were more concerned about having physically painful experiences, but did not report greater pain when having an actual physically painful experience.
He is the person most insensitive to his true needs. The narcissist drains himself of mental energy in this process. This is why he has none left to dedicate to others. This fact, as well as his inability to love human beings in their many dimensions and facets, ultimately transform him into a recluse.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
When children suffer at the hands of a narcissistic abuser, some crucial brain regions are affected, including damage to the hippocampus and amygdala. These changes lead to devastating effects on the lives of these children.
Together, past research has focused on narcissists' ability to remember self-relevant information and reason about the mental state of others. Narcissists tend to be selective about what they remember or have worse memory compared to non-narcissists.
The researchers claim that high intelligence among people leading to attainment of social status, autonomy and competence, which is a part of a narcissist personality. This research gave me a perspective on how major behavioral changes reflects on a person with high level of IQ within them.
“Individuals with high grandiose narcissism maintain unrealistically positive self‐views with regard to intelligence. They feel that high intelligence is a resource that buys people benefits in multiple domains, and they feel that they possess that resource.
Cerebral narcissists, also known as intellectual narcissists, are individuals who try to fulfill their narcissistic supply through their perceived intelligence. While intellectual narcissists are generally smart, they may present as if they are more educated than they really are.
They are punitive with money. Narcissists often use money as a tool for punishment. They may reward you financially when you do what they want, and then withhold money when they feel vindictive. This can feel unsafe, degrading and confusing.
Positive traits of “healthy narcissism” might include: positive self-image. high self-esteem. ample self-confidence.
“Grandiose narcissism appears to correlate positively with healthy self-esteem and extroversion,” Papageorgiou says. These types of narcissists tend to be very confident, which is a good thing. (A vulnerable narcissist, on the other hand, might be overly sensitive.)