ADHD makes us more sensitive to criticism. Often, our first instinct is to respond defensively or angrily to outside comments that feel like disapproval. But adults with attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) should know that doing so could sacrifice learning opportunities and the respect of others.
High levels of perceived criticism are associated with the recurrence of depression and anxiety, and lower levels of self-esteem [10–12]. ADHD is one condition that is associated with high levels of receiving and perceiving criticism [13,14].
If you live with ADHD and find that you're more sensitive to criticisms and critiques, then you might be experiencing rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD). RSD is “a near ubiquitous experience for ADHDers,” says Joel Schwartz, PsyD, an ADHD clinical psychologist in San Luis Obispo, California.
Anger is not on the official list of ADHD symptoms . However, many adults with ADHD struggle with anger, especially impulsive, angry outbursts . Triggers can include frustration, impatience, and even low self-esteem. A number of prevention tips may help adults with ADHD manage anger as a symptom.
Sensitive to Rejection. People with ADHD are exquisitely sensitive to rejection and criticism. They can experience hopelessness and demoralization because they try to succeed by imitating the paths to success of people without ADHD, and then fail over and over again because the same paths don't work for them.
With ADHD, the brain doesn't correctly attend to and interpret things like facial expression, tone of voice, and other non-verbal communication messages. Therefore, someone with ADHD misreads a lot of interpersonal interactions, doesn't respond correctly, and comes off as rude.
Many people with ADHD have behaviors that get them in trouble. Some people might tell lies. Others may have angry outbursts. These actions or words can be hurtful to others.
It is essential to realize that people with ADHD are generally emotionally sensitive and may have strong feelings of shame, preventing them from seeking the medical help they need. Aside from medications, allowing the person to process their emotions before a meltdown is a healthy way to help them cope with rejection.
As we've discussed, unfortunately, many people with ADHD tend to have a lack of empathy. This can be addressed, though, through identifying and communicating about each other's feelings. If you see a disconnect between ADHD and empathy in your child or in your spouse, don't give up hope.
Type Three is Over-Focused ADD. This includes the primary ADHD symptoms plus trouble shifting attention, being stuck on negative thoughts and behaviors, holding grudges, excessive worrying and being argumentative. People with over-focused ADD tend to need a strict routine.
Understanding conflict aversion and ADHD
It is a common trait for individuals with ADHD, who may struggle with emotional regulation and impulsivity. When faced with conflict, individuals with ADHD may feel overwhelmed, anxious, or uncertain, leading them to avoid or withdraw from the situation.
Because children and adults with ADHD struggle with focusing, organizing tasks, and feeling restless, they might experience sadness, guilt, irritability, low self-confidence and helplessness. In some cases, these symptoms can signal depression.
Many people with ADHD are, if anything, argument-averse. And certainly, you needn't have ADHD to be an argumentative son of a gun. Yet, some individuals with ADHD do habitually bait others into heated disagreements. It's typically a subconscious behavior.
Some negative thoughts come from inside you. Anxiety and low self-esteem are common in people with ADHD. You may worry that you aren't good enough or that you'll fail. Negativity also comes from outside -- parents and others who criticize you for behaviors you can't control.
ADHD brains typically expect the worst, and stressful times and situations just further encourage and validate this negative thinking. Monitoring our thoughts and actively seeking the good are essential strategies now for managing worry before it spirals out of control.
Several studies find that as children with ADHD grow into adults, their self-esteem tends to drop over time because of mounting criticism and challenging life experiences. In severe cases, Chronis-Tuscano says, low self-esteem can make depression and suicide more likely.
Many ADHD symptoms and traits can affect a person's ability to resolve conflicts. For instance, being unable to manage their emotions well can get in the way of toning down a confrontation. Being easily distracted, talking too fast or interrupting a conversation, and forgetfulness can also cause conflicts.
In an older study from 2006, researchers noted that adults with childhood ADHD had an increased risk of receiving certain personality disorders in later life. These include antisocial personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder.
Individuals with ADHD may appear self-centered in conversations because of difficulties with concentration, whereas individuals with NPD may act in self-centered ways because symptoms include an inflated sense of self and disregard for others. Neither ADHD nor NPD is a personal choice.
Similarly, people with ADHD can also experience 'meltdowns' more commonly than others, which is where emotions build up so extremely that someone acts out, often crying, angering, laughing, yelling and moving all at once, driven by many different emotions at once – this essentially resembles a child tantrum and can ...
Rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) is when you experience severe emotional pain because of a failure or feeling rejected. This condition is linked to ADHD and experts suspect it happens due to differences in brain structure.
Can someone with ADHD fall in love? While all kinds of people can fall in love, the experience of people with ADHD falling in love can be more intense for them. This is because the person with ADHD can hyperfocus on the person they are in love with.
ADHD makes us more sensitive to criticism. Often, our first instinct is to respond defensively or angrily to outside comments that feel like disapproval. But adults with attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) should know that doing so could sacrifice learning opportunities and the respect of others.
Executive functions have other roles which affect how someone thinks. In people with ADHD, these executive dysfunctions impact thinking in numerous ways. People with ADHD don't really think faster than people without it, but it can sometimes seem like they do.
“Often, kids with ADHD are so sensitive to the anger, they may not hear what you are saying about their misbehavior. Or the child may begin arguing, and things will escalate. If you get angry, you're lowering the chance she will learn from the discipline moment.”