Children who suffer from extreme shyness may grow out of it as they mature or they may grow up to be shy adults. Parents can help their children to overcome mild shyness. In severe cases, professional help may be advisable.
While many children will grow out of their shy phase or learn to adapt, for some, the feeling can grow and fester, becoming social anxiety. “There's a distinct difference between shyness and having social anxiety,” Dr. Schwartz says.
Some interact easily with other children but fall to pieces in the company of adult strangers. Others feel comfortable among adults but crumble around peers. And then there are those who feel anxious in any new situation. Most 2-year-olds will outgrow their shyness.
Shyness is partly a result of genes a person has inherited. It's also influenced by behaviors they've learned, the ways people have reacted to their shyness, and life experiences they've had. Genetics.
In particular, shyness in infancy has been found to be associated with a particular type of parenting. That is, the parents of shy children are overprotective, tend to control their children's lives and to discourage their independence and autonomy [4].
Shyness is a response to fear, and research suggests that although there is a neurobiology of shyness—the behavioral repertoire is orchestrated by a specific circuit of neurons in the brain—it is also strongly influenced by parenting practices and life experiences.
Shy people want to build connections with people but they're too anxious or lack social skills. Their fears of making mistakes control their actions. They feel hesitant and awkward when interacting with others and often turn inward to shelter themselves from social situations.
Shyness and autism are two distinct conditions that can sometimes be confused with each other, especially when it comes to children. While both conditions can result in social difficulties, they are fundamentally different in their nature and causes.
Myth 5: Shy people have low self-esteem
Shyness can affect how you see yourself and may make you feel insecure in some aspects. While a person with low self-esteem might act shy or have a tendency to keep to themselves, it doesn't mean that someone who experiences shyness is also experiencing low self-esteem.
About shyness and shy children
They might hide behind a parent or avoid joining in games. A school-age child might avoid answering questions in class, take their time making friends, prefer to sit back and watch others play, or avoid new activities.
Try to understand their fears or hesitations about showing the world who they are. Let your child know you relate to them. Tell your child about times that you felt shy. Talk to them about how you felt better.
Severely shy people may have physical symptoms like blushing, sweating, a pounding heart or upset stomach; negative feelings about themselves; worries about how others view them; and a tendency to withdraw from social interactions.
Some shy children do not know what to say in certain situations, such as when they meet a new child. Parents can help the shy children by encouraging them to practice the social skill. One effective way to help children improve a social skill is to encourage them to rehearse (role play) it (Miltenberger, 1997, p. 236).
Keep in mind that shyness isn't a weakness. But don't force them into frightening situations, either. Rehearse what to do in potentially stressful scenarios before they happen.
Although social anxiety is different than shyness, it usually develops in shy children. Kids with social anxiety worry about being judged negatively by others. They are terrified of doing or saying the wrong thing.
Covert narcissism is also known as shy, vulnerable, or closet narcissism. People with this subtype tend not to outwardly demonstrate arrogance or entitlement. Instead, they might put themselves down and seem anxious about what others think of them, rather than exuding charm or confidence.
Most of the time, no. But when it becomes anxiety, watch out.
Feelings of shyness or discomfort in certain situations aren't necessarily signs of social anxiety disorder, particularly in children. Comfort levels in social situations vary, depending on personality traits and life experiences. Some people are naturally reserved and others are more outgoing.
Shyness is not an official ADHD symptom, but experiences and struggles due to the neurodivergent condition - or another existing mental health disorder - can cause a person to become shy, aloof, and introverted.
ADHD and Shyness
Adults with ADHD can struggle with shyness. While shyness goes against the stereotypical image of a hyperactive, life-of-the-party type, ADHD is much more diverse than that image. Shyness has nothing to do with being an extrovert or introvert, or if you are hyperactive or inattentive.
Social anxiety disorder is an intense, persistent fear of being watched and judged by others. This fear can affect work, school, and other daily activities. It can even make it hard to make and keep friends. The good news is social anxiety disorder is treatable.
Shyness is a trait that can be a result of environmental factors. These factors can stem from emotional abuse, ridicule and other forms of child abuse, but not always. Some shyness is inherited.
Introversion is a personality type, while shyness is an emotion. People who are shy tend to feel awkward or uncomfortable when they're in social situations, especially when they're around strangers. They may feel so nervous, they become sweaty. Their heart may beat quicker, and they may get a stomachache.
To others, you appear modest, empathetic and non-threatening, which are all attractive qualities. So, while shy people will often ponder for a long time before they approach someone, when they do, they tend to have a consistently good experience.