Can a Widow or Widower Ever Move On? They can, as long as they seek support from others. At their own pace, they can lead a rewarding and fulfilling life after going through the pain. With wisdom and support, a widow can doubtlessly survive the grieving process.
Some people feel better sooner than they expect. Others may take longer. As time passes, you may still miss your spouse. But for most people, the intense pain will lessen.
It's common for the grief process to take a year or longer. A grieving person must resolve the emotional and life changes that come with the death of a loved one. The pain may become less intense, but it's normal to feel emotionally involved with the deceased for many years.
Widows struggle to care for themselves and their children in their own countries, refugee camps or countries of asylum. Trauma during and after the conflict: many women see their husbands tortured, mutilated or suffering other cruel and inhuman treatment.
Working through the grief process and allowing it to run its natural course is what needs to happen in order for a person to truly realize that he/she can be happy again. For some people, it takes a long time to get to the stage of grief that involves hope and a willingness to be happy again.
In another study, when compared with married couples, the prevalence of PTSD among those who have been widowed was 16% compared to 4% among the control group, and the prevalence of depression was 37% compared to 22% (O'Conner, 2010).
According to a study by the Pew Research Center, 61% of widows and widowers eventually choose to remarry. The study also revealed that men are more likely to remarry than women.
One way for widows to cope with loneliness is to join a class or club. This can be a great opportunity to meet new people and engage in activities that they enjoy. Joining a class or club can also provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment, which can be very important during the grieving process.
Often the second year is the hardest as that's when the real grief work might begin. This is the time when you may be ready to face your grief head on and deal with any issues that are holding you back.
The feel of Loneliness
Losing someone creates a gap of them in our lives. Similarly losing her spouse puts the widow into a position of loneliness. Even if the widow is always surrounded by the most loving and supportive people (friends & family) there'd still be times when she'd go through a mental state of isolation.
Depression is usually the longest and most difficult stage of grief. Depression can be a long and difficult stage in the grieving process, but it's also when people feel their deepest sadness.
Overall, the researchers also found that in the year after losing a spouse, men were 70% more likely to die than similarly aged men who did not lose a spouse, while women were 27% more likely to die compared to women who did not become widowed.
Grief and loss affect the brain and body in many different ways. They can cause changes in memory, behavior, sleep, and body function, affecting the immune system as well as the heart. It can also lead to cognitive effects, such as brain fog.
A common theme among people who have lost their spouse is the debilitating effects of feeling entirely alone and incomplete. The sense of feeling like you have lost an essential part of yourself is both painful and disconcerting. The world suddenly looks like a different place, often odd and distanced.
It's true that some widowed people do move on too fast, because they're in denial and don't want to face pain; such relationships often bear a cost.
One foolproof way to be a happier widow is to focus on what you can control (your money, your health, your core group) and let go of what you can't. Settling in with uncertainty allows you to let go of expectations of how things should be and embrace what is. No matter how pissed off you are.
” 'Widow's fire' is a term commonly used within the widower's community to describe the intense, uncontrollable, or all-consuming desire for sex following the bereavement of a partner,” Wake told SWNS.
There are 11.8 million widows in the U.S. and approximately 2,800 new widows are joining these ranks every day. The average age of widowhood in the U.S. is 59, according to a frequently cited figure attributed to the U.S. Census Bureau. And if COVID-19 continues, the ranks of younger widows could climb.
Older widows are usually more content to stay single than older widowers. They are often tired from looking after their late spouse and they see remarriage as having to take care of somebody else. Devotion to a deceased husband may also keep them single but they still go through various levels of loneliness.
Many widows who choose to remain single have had long and happy marriages and enjoy male companionship. They recognize that their ability to choose the single life rests on two essential points: financial independence and the ability and willingness to live life as an individual, rather than as one of a pair.
With wisdom and support, a widow can doubtlessly survive the grieving process. It is always possible to move forward and enjoy a meaningful and transformed life. Also, your late wife or husband would not want to see you miserable. They would want you to move on with life and be happy.