By the same token, make sure you choose a gift that hasn't already been purchased by someone else. Include a card. Make sure to enclose at least a small card with a brief message of well-wishes and your name clearly printed. The couple will want to know who you are so they can thank you!
“Never just sign your name under a Hallmark message,” says Meier. “If you're short on words, say that in your writing. Try: 'I found this card, and these words were exactly how I felt. ' That gives added emphasis to the card itself.”
“ A general rule of thumb: keep the message short, simple and sweet. Wishing the couple a wonderful life together, a beautiful wedding day and all of your love for the future is perfect. Think how you can incorporate these sentiments in your own words, and personalise them slightly to suit the couple.
American custom or tradition states the name of the bride precedes the groom's name on any printed items. So if you are known as "Brian and Sarah", your napkins in this case will be "Sarah and Brian", with Sarah obviously being the bride. The same applies if you are using initials or a monogram.
According to etiquette expert Emily Post, send wedding gifts after receiving the invitation or within three months of the wedding. We agree—this is probably an ideal time frame to present newlyweds with a gift.
The names of your wedding guests should be written in full (given and surname) on the envelope, while on the invitation just the given name in full (it's not recommended to use your guest's nicknames).
They suggest the following breakdown: coworkers or distant relatives should spend 50 to 75 dollars. Friends or relatives, 75 to 100 dollars. For close friends, family, or if you are in the wedding party, you should spend 100 to 150 dollars—or more.
First things first, whose name goes first:
Traditionally, the bride always precedes the groom. For a formal invite, we would always suggest the bride to be referred to by her first and middle names. The groom is referred by his full name and title (optional).
Addressing a Couple
NOTE: Traditionally, a woman's name preceded a man's on an envelope address, and his first and surname were not separated (Jane and John Kelly). Nowadays, the order of the names—whether his name or hers comes first—does not matter and either way is acceptable.
If you don't think it will offend the couple, the safest option is to address the check to the member of the couple you feel closest to. If you're unsure of whether or not that person will be changing their last name, use their maiden name, or the last name they had before the wedding.
Popular engravings include a large initial with their last name, a monogram, or the couple's first names and wedding date.
Cards aren't tied to an individual or account.
Even if you're buying a gift card for a specific someone, the recipient won't have their name tied to it. As far as retailers are concerned, if you have a gift card's numbers and PINs, it's yours.
Traditionally for married couples, you include the male's first and last name (i.e. Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth Arendt).
The Outer Envelope for Mailing
You'll type (or hand write, if you're feeling ambitious) your guests' names on the first line, complete with titles, first names, and last names (middle names are optional). While you can abbreviate a title, you should spell out first names.
Traditionally the name of the bride always precedes the groom's name. Formal invitations issued by the bride's parents refer to her by her first and middle names, the groom by his full name and title; if the couple is hosting by themselves, their titles are optional.
Conventional etiquette dictates that the man's name goes first, then the wife and then the children, from oldest to youngest. However, it is perfectly acceptable to put the woman's name first, especially if she is the one most closely connected to the recipient.
THE ETIQUETTE
She offers these guidelines to wedding-goers wherever they might be: A distant relative or co-worker should give $75-$100; a friend or relative, $100-$125; a closer relative, up to $150. If you are wealthy, are you expected to inflate the gift? No, Cooper says.
The average wedding gift amount hovers right around $100, which is a great place to start, and you can increase or decrease that based on how close you are.
A typical cash wedding gift could range from $50 to $500, depending on the same factors listed above. Even then, aiming for the $100 mark is generally sufficient and will be comparable to the average cost of a physical wedding gift.
For closer friends and family, you may want to consider going to $200, or higher if you can afford it. For others, $100 to $150 is more than okay as a wedding gift amount.