“The common characteristic of all kinds of narcissistic love is mania, characterized by possessiveness, obsession, and jealousy,” Dinić told PsyPost.
Narcissists are said to be envious of others and yet believe others to be envious of them; they will often project this trait onto others and make their victims feel like the insecure ones. This type of envy, while common among narcissists, isnt just limited to malignant narcissists.
The narcissist's jealousy will lead them to want to drag you back down to the level you were at when you were together. Miserable and dependent on them! The narcissist's jealousy may even lead them to try and sabotage your new relationship by spreading rumors about you or your new partner.
Narcissists are extremely jealous of anyone who is happy because they know that those people have something that they will never be able to have.
They are highly sensitive to threats to the relationship, and because of this they do get jealous easily. And unfortunately, when they do, they are liable to lash out at their partner. This is not the only reason they might become abusive, but it is a trigger.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Narcissists can never really love anyone.
That's why it's important to remember that no matter how happy and loved-up they look with their new partner, it's only a matter of time before they start being belittled and insulted too. Narcissists can never really love anyone.
People with narcissism tend not to like seeing other people happy. When they see you happy, the best thing you can do is to stay firm on your boundaries, focus on the present and what makes you happy, and avoid getting into arguments. They might try to hurt you to disrupt your peace and justify their actions.
A recent research study conducted byMogilski and Welling (2017) showed that those who had darker personality traits such as narcissism, psychopathy and duplicity tended to stay friends with their exes out of pragmatism, sex and access to resources.
Narcissists feel threatened whenever they encounter someone who appears to have something they lack—especially those who are confident and popular. They're also threatened by people who don't kowtow to them or who challenge them in any way. Their defense mechanism is contempt.
Narcissists often look for victims who struggle with insecurity and low self-esteem. People who think less of themselves and struggle with the “I am not enough” mindset tend to attract toxic partners. People with self-esteem issues tend to think of themselves as imperfect or unlovable.
A sense of entitlement might also lead someone with narcissistic personality to think anything they do for you is just the greatest. If they feel they don't get enough praise and recognition for this action, they might act like the victim: “I can't believe you act this way after all I've done for you!”
Narcissistic rage ranges from direct confrontation with name-calling and hurtful slurs, to calculated, closed down reactions like giving their partner the silent treatment for hours at a time. "They give you the cold shoulder, or they walk out and they find another woman," Greenberg said.
Narcissistic partners act as if they are always right, that they know better and that their partner is wrong or incompetent. This often leaves the other person in the relationship either angry and trying to defend themselves or identifying with this negative self-image and feeling badly about themselves.
Although they are not always sneaky, some covert narcissists can take joy in creating confusion. They may not engage in blaming or shaming, but instead, causing people to question their perceptions and second-guess themselves. This is another way to create leverage between them and another person.
If a narcissist is interested in you, you might notice that they shower you with admiration and attention shortly after you meet them. They might be quick to say “I love you,” put you on a pedestal, and make grand romantic gestures.
Narcissists can sometimes be helpful and caring. However, more often than not, they only pretend to have these qualities. Moreover, even when they act giving and helping, they are not motivated by empathy because they severely lack it, and as a result, their help is often not very productive.
The narcissist, then, is dependent on the other. He needs the other's submission to keep feeling powerful over and over. In a sense – despite how self-assured and independent he may seem – the narcissist cannot exist alone. He needs a victim to feel like he exists.
One of the most common early indicators of narcissism is what's known as the love-bombing phase. At the beginning of the relationship, the narcissist will often come on very strong, put you on a pedestal, and make you feel incredibly special.
“Because they rarely get the actual help they need, they can never get what they need from another person.” This might cause them to jump to the next relationship quickly in hopes that they'll get the satisfaction they feel they didn't find in the relationship with you.
Narcissistic personality disorder may be linked to: Environment — parent-child relationships with either too much adoration or too much criticism that don't match the child's actual experiences and achievements. Genetics — inherited characteristics, such as certain personality traits.
"Narcissists are primed to be abusive because they're so hypersensitive, and they don't have empathy, and they don't have object constancy," Greenberg said. "So they are primed to take offence and be abusive and not really understand... It's a lot of work for the non-narcissistic mate."