Avoid lying: try not to make promises you can't keep. Instead, be honest and let your loved one know you are there for them and will do the best you can to be a good friend or partner. Seek outside support: you cannot be solely responsible for your loved one's well-being.
Stop all contact with them and gain distance. This is one of the most important steps after you speak with your FP about ending the relationship. Once you say goodbye, it is generally helpful to cut all contact. I can't say it doesn't hurt, a lot, but it will be the best decision in the long run.
FP is someone who individuals with BPD often hold in the highest regard trust with their life, and are heavily emotionally attached to and dependent on [19]. They often unintentionally put their entire self-worth into the relationship with their FP, thereby making frantic efforts to prevent their FP from leaving.
Being a favorite person can feel exhausting as well. They may feel pressured to give up other interests or relationships to make their partner happy. It's common for them to feel like they're constantly walking on eggshells to avoid their partner's BPD triggers.
Splitting is a psychological mechanism which allows the person to tolerate difficult and overwhelming emotions by seeing someone as either good or bad, idealised or devalued. This makes it easier to manage the emotions that they are feeling, which on the surface seem to be contradictory.
Loneliness may be common with BPD, but it's not impossible to overcome. There are many strategies you can use to feel less alone, such as joining a support group, taking classes, caring for an animal, and finding new ways to communicate with your loved ones.
However, because of the nature of this condition, the favorite person connection may sometimes swing between extreme love and attachment, to a strong dislike. This switch may occur when the person with BPD perceives that their emotional needs aren't being adequately met.
These episodes can also involve extreme feelings of positivity and euphoria. People with this condition can be very impulsive. It's important to note these emotional highs as signs of an episode because they may be involved in risky behavior as well.
If you want to accept yourself, you'll find that it's helpful to turn your focus away from yourself for several hours a week and aim that focus to people who could use your help. Spend your time helping others. You can start by visiting friends and family. You can also get involved in a charity.
For someone with this type of BPD relationship, a “favorite person” is someone they rely on for comfort, happiness, and validation. The relationship with a BPD favorite person may start healthy, but it can often turn into a toxic love-hate cycle known as idealization and devaluation.
An “FP” (or Favorite Person) is a person who someone with mental illness relies on for support, and often looks up to or idolizes. Common with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it's often that someone has a minimum of one FP, but a person can have many.
Borderline personality disorder is one of the most painful mental illnesses since individuals struggling with this disorder are constantly trying to cope with volatile and overwhelming emotions.
In quiet BPD, instead of confronting them or bursting out in rage, you shut down. You may disappear, ignore the offender, unfriend them on social media, or give them the silent treatment. If you don't give others a chance to explain or to try and mend the relationship, they may not even be aware of what has happened.
Pulling someone into a close relationship and then pushing that person away repeatedly is one of the most well-known symptoms of BPD. It causes the person in question to be confused about where they stand in the relationship.
Simply recognise the desire without judging it. You can contemplate wanting to get rid of it - because you feel guilty about having such a foolish desire - but just lay it aside. Then, when you see it as it is, recognising that it's just desire, you are no longer attached to it.
Although BPD personalities initiate a break-up as a way of seeking validation, because of the intense anxiety at play, they'll often express intense regret because of their abandonment wounding, especially if they're not met with the response they desire.
Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.
People with BPD may be sensitive to rejection and abandonment and are prone to splitting, rage, and impulsivity. If a person with BPD feels rejected or abandoned, they may end the relationship. However, this is usually followed by significant anxiety and regret and efforts to get back together.