Remember that you will likely have to work a little harder to challenge the boundaries of the friend zone than you would if you were never in the friend zone to begin with. Though moving a friendship to a relationship is definitely possible, it's often easier to skip the friendship phase altogether.
Most often, it's a term to describe that someone is just not interested. But when there's a sense of being slighted, you're not in the “friend zone;” you're probably just not friends. When you're legitimately friends with someone, it's not a “zone” you move in and out of. You're truly present for the other person.
On the most basic level, you are in the friend zone with someone if they only see you as a friend and don't have any romantic or sexual feelings for you. They might even see you like a sibling. This usually occurs with someone you've known for a while, such as a childhood friend or someone in a shared friend group.
She might be putting you in the friend zone because, for now, that's the only place where there's room. Take it as a compliment that she's not using you to get over another guy, and wants to keep you around. While all relationships take work, friendships are lower maintenance than relationship relationships.
Do friends become romantic partners in real life? The answer is yes! In our research, conducted at the University of Manitoba, University of Waterloo, and the University of Victoria, we found that not only are romantic couples platonic friends before they become romantically involved, this path to romance is common.
Believing in the Friend Zone Becomes Toxic
If we accept the friend zone doesn't exist, we also recognize the rejection as absolute. Believing in the friend zone, however, allows us to imagine the opposite. Believing in the friend zone allows us to believe there is a way get out of it, therefore we never truely move on.
Just make sure you're not at their beck and call, and you might even see the positive effects of ignoring a girl who friend-zoned you. Just be a bit busy with yourself and let them know that they're going to need to try harder to get your attention. Most importantly, don't be a douche about it.
Some people don't realize that the friend zone can be a form of social rejection, which can actually cause a hurt similar to physical pain.
Being clear about your intentions is essential when dealing with rejection. It may take a while for her to feel comfortable seeing you alone, but remember that you can still be friends, even if you don't see her one-on-one.
"A situationship is that space between a committed relationship and something that is more than a friendship," explains psychotherapist and author Jonathan Alpert. "Unlike a friends with benefits or relationship, there isn't consensus on what it is." Why is this becoming a trend now?
For example, it's possible to mistake your love for a close friend for romantic love. You may just have a number of shared interests or similar personalities. However, close friends can (and often do) fall in love because it's sometimes human nature to fall in love with someone close to you.
This type of friendship may include kissing, cuddling, holding hands, sleeping on the same bed, etc. In a romantic friendship, the love and connection is deeper than what normal friends share. They also express how much they love each other without mincing words or pretending not to have feelings.
See if your crush tells you about other people they like.
This is a dead giveaway that the person only sees you as a friend. If your crush goes on and on about how much he likes his cute coworker or how much she wants a new girl in school to ask her out, then you are definitely in the Friend Zone.
Just tell her that you've really liked being her friend, but that you want to take your relationship to the next level. Make her see that you've really thought about it, and that, though you value your friendship, you're willing to take the risk to take your relationship to the next level.
She might have a dozen reasons, such as she's not interested in a relationship right now, she's not attracted to people of your gender, she's focusing on her career or education, or she has friendlier feelings for you, etc. Or maybe it is you. But that doesn't mean it's a bad thing. Maybe she values you as a friend.
In short, yes, it's totally possible to get out of the friend zone, but it will take a lot of time and a lot of effort.