How do you spot a quiet borderline?

What Are the Signs and Symptoms of Quiet BPD?
  • A fear of abandonment, whether real or imagined.
  • A pattern of unstable relationships.
  • Instability and insecurity in self-image.
  • Impulsive, high-risk behaviors, such as excessive spending, promiscuity or substance abuse.
  • Suicidal behavior or self-harm.
  • Intense mood swings.

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What is a quiet BPD episode like?

If you have quiet BPD, you direct moods and behaviors inward, so other people don't see. Your emotions and behaviors may feel like a roller coaster with many ups and downs. You may have difficulty in your relationships due to fear of abandonment.

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What does quiet BPD rage look like?

For example, while a person with typical BPD might show outward signs of rage, a person with quiet BPD might turn that rage inward and engage in self destructive behaviors. Similarly, a person with typical BPD might have crying fits or throw tantrums, while someone with quiet BPD will become moody and withdrawn.

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Is quiet BPD worse than normal BPD?

The main difference is that with quiet BPD, you internalize emotional struggles and episodes. While those with BPD have intense impulsivity, anger outbursts, and episodes of anxiety and depression that are obvious to those around them, turning anger inward is more typical with quiet BPD.

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How rare is quiet BPD?

While people with quiet BPD often seem fine outwardly, they are struggling inside with feelings of intense loneliness, shame, or self-criticism. BPD is estimated to affect about 1.6% of the population at any one time. However, some estimates put the percentage closer to 6%.

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6 Ways to Easily Identify Quiet BPD

20 related questions found

What kind of trauma causes quiet BPD?

Some of these include: Traumatic childhood experiences: Situational factors that may increase someone's risk of developing BPD include experiencing abuse, neglect or prolonged exposure to stress as a child.

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Do people with quiet BPD have a Favourite person?

For someone with BPD, the favorite person is deemed the most important person in their life. This person can be anyone, but it's often a romantic partner, family member, good friend, or another supportive person (like a coach, therapist, or teacher).

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Do people with quiet BPD have a favorite person?

People with BPD feel firmly attached to their favorite person and may depend on them for comfort, reassurance, and guidance. In many cases, someone with BPD may rely entirely on their favorite person. As a result, they may idealize them and expect them to always be available.

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What does a BPD meltdown look like?

For many folks with BPD, a “meltdown” will manifest as rage. For some, it might look like swinging from one intense emotion to another. For others, it might mean an instant drop into suicidal ideation. Whatever your experience is, you're not alone.

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Do people with quiet BPD explode?

Quiet BPD is an internalizing disorder, while BPD is typically an externalizing disorder. Someone with Quiet BPD 'implodes' rather than 'explodes'. You put yourself down when bad things happen, and when you feel rage, you hurt yourself rather than lash out at others.

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Do borderlines cry a lot?

To evaluate crying behavior, we used a set of specially designed tools. Compared to non-patients, BPD patients showed the anticipated higher crying frequency despite a similar crying proneness and ways of dealing with tears.

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Can quiet BPD have outbursts?

The main difference between classic BPD and quiet BPD is that a person with classic BPD externalises their emotions through explosive outbursts, whereas one with quiet BPD directs those outbursts inwards, hiding their suffering.

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What can BPD be mistaken for?

The symptoms of BPD are very broad, and some can be similar to or overlap with other mental health problems, such as:
  • Bipolar disorder.
  • Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD)
  • Depression.
  • Anxiety.
  • Psychosis.
  • Antisocial personality disorder (ASPD)

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Why does BPD suddenly go silent?

Someone suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) may start giving you the silent treatment. Manipulation, difficulty controlling and regulating emotions, and the consequences of fear of abandonment are the most common causes of this behavior.

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Do borderlines know they hurt you?

Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.

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How is quiet BPD different from regular BPD?

Those with stereotypical BPD externalize their anger, while those with "quiet BPD" aim their emotional volatility at themselves. Symptoms of "quiet BPD" include blaming yourself for everything and self-isolating based on the belief that you deserve abandonment.

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Who is attracted to borderline personality?

Borderline/dependent: A person with borderline personality disorder (BPD) is well-matched with a person who has a dependent personality disorder (DPD). The BPD has an intense fear of abandonment which is a good match for the DPD who will not leave even a dysfunctional relationship.

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Do BPD hold grudges?

What others perceive as a simple mistake to be brushed off, people with BPD might perceive as a serious wrongdoing. You might hold onto a grudge for days, or until the person has apologized sufficiently.

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What is the break up cycle of borderline personality disorder?

So, what exactly does the BPD break up cycle look like? It can look like fear of abandonment, distrust of a partner, cheating, lack of communication and self-blame. It can look like idolizing a partner, confusing strong emotions for passion, anxiety and overreacting to interactions perceived as negative.

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Do people with BPD say things they don't mean?

Once upset, borderline people are often unable to think straight or calm themselves in a healthy way. They may say hurtful things or act out in dangerous or inappropriate ways.

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Are people with quiet BPD impulsive?

What is quiet BPD? Stereotypically, a person with BPD exhibits symptoms such as anger outbursts, irrational accusation of others, and self-destructive, impulsive behaviour. In the case of quiet BPD, these things become invisible. The volatility is directed inward rather than out.

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Why is it hard to date someone with BPD?

Dating someone with borderline personality disorder can be challenging. Your partner may have major difficulties with strong emotions, drastic mood swings, chronic fear of abandonment, and impulsive behaviors that can strain your relationship with chaos and instability.

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What foods should people with borderline personality disorder avoid?

Consider cutting out all processed food and sugar for a few weeks and observe your energy level and your emotions. Avoid misusing alcohol or caffeine, as these also can intensify mood instability. BPD sometimes includes symptoms of self-harm or substance abuse.

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