Try jumping jacks, push-ups or jog on the spot, if you have enough space and privacy do so before the funeral. Otherwise, simply pinching yourself could be enough to stop crying. Others bite their cheek, dig their nails into the palm of their hand, or stretch as a means of distraction.
Is it normal not to cry? It is perfectly normal not to cry when someone dies. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, and everyone deals with loss in their own way. It doesn't mean that you don't care, that you are cold, or that you are broken in any way.
How do you emotionally prepare yourself for a funeral?
Nurture your senses: listen to music or the sounds that abound in nature. Engage in prayer or meditation: tap into, or get reacquainted with, your spiritual side. Reduce your list of necessary activities and chores: now is the time to delegate tasks to others, so you can devote your time to self-care.
Often funerals can bring up thoughts of other people who have died. It's quite common to find that you are grieving someone you didn't expect to. Sometimes people feel worried or even guilty that they are not focussing on the 'right' feelings or even the right person. But it's very normal.
Don't tell friends or family members who are grieving that their loved one has gone to a better place. Never call the death a blessing or speculate that it was that person's time. Avoid saying anything that suggests that the loss of the loved one is a positive thing.
This means no jeans, shorts, or tank tops. Instead, opt for dark, conservative clothing. Women should avoid wearing anything too revealing or flashy, and men should make sure their clothing is clean and wrinkle-free.
Finally, remind yourself that crying at a funeral is a natural part of the grieving process. You're allowed to show your emotions, even if it feels awkward at first. In fact, some cultures include crying as part of the wake etiquette.
Be kind to yourself. Techniques such as mindfulness may help you regulate your breathing or feel more restful, while a hot bath or aromatherapy oils such as lavender or chamomile may be a soothing way to prepare for a funeral you're anxious about and part of your coping strategy.
Attending a visitation can be the hardest part for people to attend, because it involves talking to the deceased's family. A good recommendation is to say something simple such as “I am sorry about your loss”, especially if there are many other guests waiting to share their condolences.
The appropriate attire for a funeral or memorial service is simple: dress to show respect for the person whose life you are remembering. This means selecting clothes that are more conservative, not flashy or brightly colored. Darker dresses, suits, pants, jackets and sweaters are appropriate.
If you weren't close to the person who died, you might not feel the need to cry as others do. If the death was sudden, you might be in shock and unable to process your emotions. Some people internalize their emotions and grieve in their own way; this is also normal.
