If the narcissists sees you doing well and looking swell, they're going to get antsy. They will ask around about you to basically check that you're doing as good as you seem to be. They want to know if more about what the deal is and will ask friends, family and anyone else for details.
They tend to want to be the best and seem the happiest at the expense of another person's well-being. You might notice that they use detrimental behavior to devalue the happy people around them. This is likely because they want to stand out and do what they can to gain higher status and make others unhappy.
Narcissists will often not show any emotion when they see you with someone else. They won't say anything or make any comments. But that doesn't mean they're not hurting on the inside. They might be feeling sad, jealous, and even angry when they see you with someone else.
When you are happy and they can't understand your happiness, they then compare it to their current mood. If they are low on narcissistic supply and need you to feel bad about yourself, then they will show their dislike for your happiness in the moment.
Narcissists crave praise but view it as scarce. As a result, they are unlikely to praise others freely or completely. For example, when you show up sporting a new hair style, they may say something such as,Well, look at you! Youre left wondering, is that a compliment?
When you are nice to the narcissist, you have your guard down and are more likely to trust them. You will be more likely to believe their love bombing because you are not a narcissist and connect to people through shared emotions.
Gaslighters/narcissists can never fully compliment someone unless there is an insult tied to it. In broad terms, it's sometimes known as a “backhanded compliment.” An example would be, “I like your dress, it almost fits you.” The compliment-insult, or complisult, first sets you up, trusting the person ever so slightly.
Narcissists hate happy people. They can't stand them, for one simple reason: because they're the complete opposite of narcissists. Happy people are always satisfied with what life has given them and know that there is nothing better than to be themselves.
The best way to shut down a narcissist is to walk away from them. If all else fails, you can physically remove yourself from the conversation. Even if they keep talking, simply turn around and walk away. If they follow you, close the door.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Thus, narcissists may pay special attention to their appearance, leading to observable manifestations such as matching, fashionable clothes, and a tidy, organized appearance. Another characteristic of narcissists that might affect their physical appearance is their desire to be the center of attention.
“As narcissists do not have empathy, they are not able to genuinely care or love you,” explains Davey. Instead, narcissists will only have people in their lives that benefit them; they are very selfish people.
The truth is that nothing can make a narcissist happy, because their agenda of dominance, exploitation and oppression creates an ever-expanding chasm within their soul. The narcissist can take pleasure in the exercise of power and the subjugation of others, but they can't feel happiness from any source.
Most narcissists enjoy an irrational and brief burst of relief after having suffered emotionally ("narcissistic injury") or after having sustained a loss. It is a sense of freedom, which comes with being unshackled.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
Simply put, narcissists hate being ignored. They probably want to make you feel ashamed, regretful, and rattled. They want to be in control and will go to any length to keep feeling empowered. It's critical to understand that a narcissist will not leave you alone the first time you ignore them.
They will never be happy for you.
They are unwilling to think about your needs. They lack insight into your emotions. They believe you should feel the same way they feel. “Most narcissists lack the capacity to give significant, authentic love and empathy, and you have no choice but to deal with this reality …
Empathize with Their Feelings
It is extremely soothing to Narcissists when you demonstrate that you understand and empathize with how they feel. But..do not insert anything about how the situation makes you feel, or anything about you at all unless it is an apology.
Narcissists are frightened, fragile people.
Rejection, humiliation, and even the tiniest of defeats can shake them to their core. This leaves narcissists wholly focused on their image.
They're often introverted, sensitive, and prone to experiencing anxiety and shame. They may also struggle to maintain close friendships as they focus heavily on themselves, require attention, and are hyper-sensitive to perceived criticism.
You can expect grandiose narcissists to lash out when wounded. The more insulted they feel, the more rage they're likely to feel. And the more intense their rage, the more viciously they're likely to attack. The problem with them is as insidious as it is tragic.
By definition, someone with traits of narcissism is unlikely to act selflessly because they lack the ability to empathize or see the needs of those around them.