Many scientists believe that the body chemistry that ignites a couple's sexual and emotional attraction usually lasts about two or three years but can start changing as soon as a few months after meeting. Some lucky couples report staying in love for two decades, but that's not the norm.
Just as love and attraction can fade, they can also be rekindled with time, effort, and patience—so long as both partners are willing to put the work in. Do You Feel Like You've Fallen Out Of Love With Your Partner?
If you find yourself totally disinterested in what your partner thinks, feels, says or does, it's likely that loving feeling is gone. Arzt adds people who “only do the bare minimum” may be falling out of love. “They may oblige with date night, but they feel restless and bored,” she says.
While it may feel impossible and certainly takes time to stop loving someone, it's absolutely possible to do just that. In fact, you may find that in no longer loving this person you open yourself up to the possibility of loving others — and even yourself.
It's truly possible to take a turn toward getting back the love you once shared with another person. The short answer to the question of whether we can stop ourselves from falling out of love is yes. Staying in love is possible, but like most good things in life, it usually takes some effort.
Genuine love is profound—it does not come and go every now and then; it is something that is likely to last over time. This does not mean that love cannot fade away, but even when it does, it leaves some scars, or rather potential feelings that can flourish if and when the environment is conducive.
It's possible to feel like you've suddenly lost interest in your partner and that you no longer care for them as you once did. This isn't always as sudden as it seems as it can be the result of issues that have been building up for some time.
Falling out of love can be a very scary feeling. It might feel like having noticeably less interest in your partner and feeling less excited about spending time with them, even though you still care about them.
So yes, it's entirely possible to never get over someone "if you don't begin to take time out to have therapy and understand what you're doing and how you're feeling," Mutanda says. Spending time alone and 'dating' yourself is so important after a relationship. You need time to be you again, she says.
There are many reasons why you may decide to stop loving someone—perhaps your feelings aren't returned, or maybe your partner repeatedly acts in ways that are against your best interests. Whatever the grounds, pulling away from someone you held such strong feelings for is never easy.
If you feel empty even when your partner is very present in your life, that could indicate a deeper issue. You might suspect that this relationship isn't a good fit for you or experience self-doubt. It's important not to jump to conclusions. As mentioned above, depression is one common cause of feelings of emptiness.
If you're not sharing what's really on your mind, it might be a sign that you no longer want a deep connection. Similarly, if you've found that the usual fun banter between you is gone, or it's difficult to have engaging conversations, your bond could be getting weaker.
What can cause someone to lose feelings? It can happen when their partner isn't appreciative of them or doesn't make them a priority. Some other reasons include: not being compatible enough and letting stagnancy take over the relationship.
They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, according to Mental-Health-Matters. These are the natural ways for your heart to heal.
At this point, reviving your relationship with your partner may seem futile. But it's absolutely possible, according to Michelle Herzog, LMFT, a Chicago-based couples therapist and AASECT-certified sex therapist. She believes that, yes, you can fall back in love with your partner—but it won't be easy.
There is no set-in-stone rule for this. You can lose your feelings in a few weeks or take years to let go of those feelings. Most times, it depends on how deeply you loved them, how you prioritize your healing process (and cut all ties with them), and how you are taking care of your needs at the moment.
While breakups hit women the hardest, they tend to recover more fully. Men, on the other hand, never fully recover. Women experience more emotional pain following a breakup, but they also more fully recover, according to new research from Binghamton University.
Staying silent can also help you feel empowered. You're taking charge and showing your ex that you're capable of and willing to live life without them. Whether you're the one who was hurt or the one who ended it, cutting off communication after a breakup puts you in control.
How long heartbreak lasts. After six weeks most people start to adjust to life without their ex, says Durvasula. “It could be a lot quicker, but typically it's not much longer,” she says. “I tell my clients all the time: Give everything six weeks before you think you are not coping well.”