The family of the deceased will be in a period of mourning for 49 days after the funeral. Once a week they will visit the grave to place fresh flowers and to burn incense. On the 3rd, 7th and 49th days they will have a short memorial service at the site, led by the Shinto priest.
Traditional mourning practices include wearing black clothing, refraining from certain activities or celebrations, and participating in memorial services on specific anniversaries of the death. Some families may include portraits, incense, shrines, and other meaningful tokens as part of their funeral services.
Length of Time
Ceremonies will often spread over several days. Most typically, they are split into two parts, a wake and then the formal funeral. The wake might be held the night before. It may be appropriate to only attend the wake if you did not know the deceased well.
In many Buddhist traditions, 49 days is the total mourning period, with prayers conducted every 7 days, across 7 weeks. These Buddhists believe that rebirth takes place within 49 days after death. So these prayers are conducted to facilitate this journey of the deceased into the afterlife.
In Japan, almost everyone is cremated. This practice stems from the Shinto tradition, the indigenous religion from Japan, but also from the fact that there is no place to bury someone in Japan. There is simply no space. The Japanese tradition of death is rich in rituals, which mainly are derived from Buddhism.
As mentioned, black and white are both mourning colors in Japan. Wooden condolence gifts are often tied in envelopes stringed in black and white. Black in Japanese culture also symbolizes hair and eyes.
Flowers are not generally a significant element in Japanese funeral culture. If you do choose to send them, however, you should follow proper etiquette. Lilys and chrysanthemums in yellow and white are appropriate choices. In Japanese culture “koden” is a more appropriate sympathy expression than flowers.
Shiva is a Hebrew word meaning "seven" and refers to a seven-day period of formalized mourning by the immediate family of the deceased. Shiva begins immediately after the burial and concludes a short time after the morning service (Shacharit) on the seventh day.
In Chinese culture, a mourning period can last for 100 days, which is the length of time it may take for someone's soul to be reborn as another person. During that period, bereaved people might continue to wear grieving colours, and might feel it inappropriate to go to celebratory occasions, like weddings.
Etiquette books recommended that mothers mourn a child for one year, a child mourn a parent for one year, and siblings mourn for six months. Widowers mourned for only three months by wearing armbands, badges, or rosettes of black fabric.
'Kouden' is a monetary gift to offer to the deceased and the survivors in place for incense or flower.
Most people do not practice any religion and do not have any fixed ideas about which burial method they prefer. In modern Japan, the percentage of cremation is almost 100% and is the standard form of funeral that is also socially accepted as the most uncontroversial.
White in Japanese (Shiro)
However, because of Buddhism's influence in Japan, it was also a traditional color of mourning associated with death, and was the color samurais wore to perform seppuku – a ritual suicide.
In Japan, it is a common saying that Japanese are born Shinto but die Buddhist. In Shintoism, the emphasis is on purity and cleanliness. Terminal illnesses, dying and death are considered “negative” or impure and akin to “contamination.” Frank discussions on death and dying may be difficult at first.
Money and chrysanthemums in Japan
During the cremation ceremony, those present also place flowers in the coffin. White and yellow chrysanthemums and lilies are particularly suitable, because they're associated with death. Flowers in bright colours are taboo.
Unlike the United Kingdom, Australia does not enter an official period of mourning, although there will be a fortnight-long “plan for observance”.
A mourning period of 12 days is undertaken, with the family isolating themselves from social engagements. This ends on the thirteenth day with the ritual of Kriya, where riceballs and milk are offered to the deceased to show the gratitude of the family for the life of that person.
Sheloshim: This refers to the first 30 days of mourning, starting with the funeral and including the shiva period. Sheloshim is the Hebrew word for “thirty.” Sheloshim is a period of transition between being completely enveloped by sadness and beginning to emerge back into the world.
Flag announcement: HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN (1926 – 2022) - National Day of Mourning for Australia. The Prime Minister has announced a National Day of Mourning for Australia on Thursday 22 September 2022 for the late Sovereign, Elizabeth the Second.
During these thirteen days, the family and friends of the deceased are given the freedom to express their grief rather than keep it bottled up inside. Most of the Hindu mourning rituals performed are designed to promote the free expression of emotions.
The Talmud says, "When the month of Av begins, we [i.e. Jews] reduce our joy." The Nine Days inaugurates an even greater level of communal and personal mourning in recognition of the many tragedies and calamities that befell the Jewish people at this time.
Sweet pea / Suitopi. Sweet pea flowers are native to Italy and arrived in Japan at the turn of the 20th century. “Suitopi” is a transliteration of the flower's English name. In the language of flowers, they mean goodbye.
It is generally acceptable to wear red in Japan, but some contexts such as religious sites or funerals may require more subdued colors like black or white. Neutral colors like black, gray, navy blue, light ... In short: Yes.
Another colour that is said to symbolize love is orange. However, this is an opinion mostly held by Eastern countries like China and Japan. The vibrancy of this colour is why the Easterners feel that it represents happiness, love and courage.