Sadly, an obsession can last for years without proper healing or distance. As previously explained, if the brain has a steady source of those love chemicals, it will keep coming back for more just like with any drug.
Obsessive love is thought to sometimes have its roots in childhood trauma and may begin at first sight; it may persist indefinitely, sometimes requiring psychotherapy. The disorder most commonly associated with obsessive love is borderline personality disorder.
Stages of Relationships by Months
Stage 1: The euphoric stage - 6 months to 24 months (2 years) Stage 2: The early attachment stage - 12 months (1 year) to 60 months (5 years) Stage 3: The crisis stage - 60 months (5 years) to 84 months (7 years) Stage 4: The deep attachment stage - 84 months (7 years) and beyond.
It is possible to treat the mental health conditions and other causes that can lead to obsessive love, especially with adequate support. However, this is only possible if the person with feelings of obsessive love feels able to seek help and support.
Since obsessive love disorder is not classified as a mental health condition, it is hard for it to have an identifiable cause. However, it has been linked to other mental health disorders such as post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and borderline personality disorder.
In 1979, Dorothy Tennov coined the term “limerence” for the first stage of love, characterized by physical symptoms (flushing, trembling, palpitations), excitement, intrusive thinking, obsession, fantasy, sexual excitement, and the fear of rejection.
The difference between love and obsession can be measured by the extent of your partner's possessiveness. In love, a little possessiveness is natural. But obsessive love does not work that way. An obsessive partner will show over-possessiveness and constantly feel scared of losing you to someone else.
One of the easiest ways to learn how to stop being obsessive in a relationship is to distract yourself. If you're having difficulty letting go of your obsessions, spend time doing things you enjoy or take up a new hobby. You might also consider distracting yourself with a movie, a good book, or a walk around the block.
Obsession with another person often stems from a lack of self-esteem or an anxious attachment style. However, you may be able to reduce this obsession through a few steps. Are You Struggling To Move On From A Crush?
“Usually, infatuation lasts for between 18 months and three years,” says Mundin. “Unless a long-distance relationship is involved or an extremely insecure individual is fascinated, infatuation rarely lasts longer.”
Physical attraction, sexual compatibility, empathy, and emotional connection are key to making a man fall in love with a woman.
Violating the Person's Privacy & Boundaries
This may include a perceived need to read the other person's texts, go through their things, or even stalk and harass them. Jealous delusions and obsessive love are especially dangerous when combined because they're closely linked with assault, abuse, and violent crime.
Love is a feeling from the heart, and obsession can be termed as a crazy feeling. Though love and obsession are related in some aspects, the two can never be thought to be the same. Love is a feeling that is uncontrollable, and a feeling which one has for another person. Love always means caring, supportive and giving.
Many people who experience obsessions show a genetic predisposition to it. One thought is that obsessions may be something that we inherit through our DNA. Other experts think there may be chemical differences within some peoples' brains that might make you more likely to have obsessions.
We become obsessed with certain people because we have fundamental neural systems that drive us into a state of infatuation, and these can be overactivated at times in our lives when we are vulnerable to the romantic potential of a person who matches our subconscious template of a desirable mate.
Being romantically rejected can be a familiar feeling that mirrors one's childhood, leading that person to seek out more of the same. People with a history of rejection may sometimes subconsciously seek out similar scenarios, hoping that the story will have a different ending.
"The biggest reason a healthy, normal infatuation fails to mature and instead shifts into an unhealthy obsession is when someone gives you just enough attention and encouragement to fuel your feelings but not enough for you to feel sure of him," says Schwartz.
Infatuation is romance and sex rolled into one colossal high. Authentic love takes that one step further to attachment; wanting to stay together. Infatuation is about idealizing romantic love. Real love accepts the good, bad, and ugly.
Obsession is a feeling of intense infatuation while love is a feeling of strong affection. Someone who is obsessed often has a need for constant contact, acts possessive, and ignores their partner's boundaries.
There's no limit to how long attraction can last. It might be brief, or might last for the rest of your life. Some people become less attracted to their romantic partners over time, or the kind of attraction they feel might change—especially when the other person changes—but this doesn't always happen.