Time-sensitive messages should be answered as soon as possible, while you have more time for nonurgent ones. But not that long. Gottsman, speaking "from a polite factor" believes you should respond within a day. "That sounds like a very long time for some people but we all have busy lives."
It depends on the situation and the people involved. If you're close friends or in a relationship, then 12 hours is probably not too long, as long as you're not doing it all the time. However, if you're getting to know someone or you're not sure how they feel about you, then 12 hours might be too long.
#1: Living by the 3 day rule
So don't wait until the next day to text a girl, or the day after that. Text her immediately after getting her number – within fifteen minutes after you meet her is good. Even better, text her when you're right in front of her.
2-3 Hours:
This is like how long it takes people to respond to a missed call from their parents, or finally start doing the homework they've been putting off for some time. That would mean you're pretty important; the person just wants to have ample time to maintain the entire conversation once they finally do respond.
Wait 4 hours before texting again if they don't respond.
Studies have shown that after 4 hours, you're more likely to get a response if you text again. That gives you enough time to restart the conversation and makes you sound less clingy.
Sure, it's polite and respectful to respond to messages and answer questions as soon as possible, but taking a few hours — or even days — to do so doesn't always mean someone is actively trying to be rude or disrespectful toward you.
Dry texting is what happens when someone gives you short, non-engaging replies in a texting conversation. It can also be super repetitive and just plain boring, says Claudia Cox, a relationship coach and founder of Text Weapon.
Popularized by the romcom, the three-day dating rule insists that a person wait three full days before contacting a potential suitor. A first-day text or call is too eager, a second-day contact seems planned, but three days is, somehow, the perfect amount of time.
Reaching out less rather than cutting him off makes a guy miss you. You don't have to completely stop texting to get his attention — just slow down how often you reach out. Shoot him a text once or twice a week instead of every day so he has a little more space.
There is no universal rule on whether to wait for her to text or you be the one to text first. It is not rude to text a girl first, especially in that early phase after you just got her number.
The INSIDER Summary: A study from the dating app Hinge shows that double-texting can increase a date's likelihood to respond. The key is to wait four hours before the second text. Sending a second text even a week later increased the likelihood of a response.
Very rarely, he might forget to reply the same day. Sometimes, it is okay to let it go as he might be too busy and forget to respond. This is normal.
Don't worry if you two don't talk every single day.
Not everyone wants to chat with their S.O. every day, and that's okay! The person that you're dating might prefer just to check in every now and then, and that's not a bad thing.
Excessive texting—especially when it involves demanding to know where someone is, who they are with, and what they are doing—is controlling and abusive. If you're in a relationship with someone who texts excessively or aggressively, you may want to distance yourself from them.
Be Patient and Give Him at Most a Week to Respond
It can be disheartening to spend hours waiting on a text that doesn't come but it's important to remain positive about it. Chances are either he is busy or maybe holding back for a few days to not seem “desperate”.
Give it a few days (or even a week).
It might feel tough waiting for him to text you, but your crush might truly be busy and unable to respond to your messages right away. Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing.
The three day rule is a dating strategy that suggests waiting three days to call your date after you go out. The theory is that waiting three days makes you look less eager and/or desperate, and gives your date time to realize how much they liked you when they think you might not contact them.
By the fourth date, you'll want to let your guard down a bit and shed the interview-ready façade. In other words, on the fourth date, you can be a bit more casual and reveal more of your personality and quirks. You want the person you're dating to get to know you and make sure that they like you (and you like them).
Cold texting is reaching out via SMS to a contact without their prior consent or permission. It's similar to cold calling and cold emailing. Some examples that would lead to cold texting include: Purchasing a contact list from a third party. Finding customers' phone information online.
Your guy might prefer to text a bit less, or he might not like texting at all. It's worth checking in with his comfort levels and preferences. Some guys send dry texts because they aren't fans of texting, so keep in mind a dry text doesn't immediately mean that your guy doesn't like you.
“Bad at texting” is a red flag
If the person you're dating is “bad at texting” and they don't make an effort to communicate with you in other ways, they're probably not interested. … Or, they're giving the bare-minimum effort in order to keep you around without investing too much of their own effort.
While you may know, rationally, that there are plenty of good reasons for someone not to respond to a text or an email—they're busy, they haven't seen the message yet, they're thinking about what they want to say—it doesn't always feel that way in a society where everyone seems to be on their smartphone all the time.
Responses may be delayed, but a complete lack of response leaves the other person feeling unimportant, or that something is wrong. If the communication you are receiving is rude or abusive, then you should ignore it. But you will need to consider some type of action to resolve the situation.
If you have made repeated efforts to contact someone and they won't respond, it is a strong indicator that you've been ghosted. Ghosting can also occur on social media. It involves cutting off all social media contact with another person without explanation.