If you cannot honestly answer that you would be comfortable hanging out with them both, and truly happy your ex had met someone, you should not be hanging out. Ideally, you would wait six to 12 months after a breakup before even asking yourself that question.
“Yes, it is possible to be friends with an ex right after the breakup, especially if you have had a strong foundation built on friendship before you became lovers,” Celia Schweyer, dating expert at Dating Scout, tells Elite Daily.
But most importantly, it's a sign of maturity. It takes a strong person to admit that someone they had loved once no longer holds a place in their heart anymore. But it takes an even stronger person to respect your ex and the memories by offering them a place in your life.
After a messy breakup, wait 6 weeks before texting.
However, most no-contact periods shouldn't go for longer than 45 days unless you and your ex agree to wait—otherwise, she might move on a little more than you want her to.
There's no set timeline for how long it takes to get over a breakup. For some people, it takes just a few weeks or months, while for others, it can take years. It's important for both people to feel like they've moved on—or are in the process of doing so successfully—before trying to be friends.
When you're going through a breakup, it can be tough to resist the temptation to contact your ex. You may think that reaching out will somehow change their mind and get them back. However, this is never the case. Contacting an ex who dumped you almost always repels them.
They're friends with their ex
Feeling threatened by an ex is a normal feeling — but it's not a red flag. Maybe they were friends before they started dating. Perhaps they value each other's opinions or words of advice. Or maybe they dated so long ago that every ounce of romantic connection has simply disappeared.
Your ex might want to be friends if they're trying not to hurt your feelings or they want the breakup to be amicable. They might also want to be friends if they want to get back together with you or hook up with you.
“Space can be from a couple of hours to a couple of days or weeks,” says Ruiz, though he generally doesn't recommend his clients take longer than 3 to 4 weeks. “The timeframe that is being considered should be reasonable for both parties to agree with,” he says.
According to much research, about 40 to 50 percent of couples get back together after a breakup. While this is positive, many factors determine the chances of getting back together after a breakup.
If the breakup was kind of dramatic and sudden, you may want to reach out after a week or two. While that's always an option, it's still probably best to take a few months to cool off. If they reach out first to repair things and you want that as well but it hasn't been at least 90 days, go ahead and tell them.
Tell him directly that you want to be friends.
Simply say, "I hope we can still be friends" or ask the question "We're still friends, right?" Don't leave this issue unaddressed - if you're vague about what you want from your new relationship, he might think you're trying to get back together with him.
"Being platonic friends with an ex (after a bit of cooling off time) is completely fine, as long as you respect boundaries, don't force your partner to hang out with your ex and let everyone know there's no chance of reconciliation," says online dating expert Julie Spira.
Your friendship with your ex is strong and rewarding. Your ex is seen as a possible “backup” if the current relationship fails. Your ex is still part of your larger group of friends. You feel like you invested a lot of time and have been through a lot with your ex.
You can get friend-zoned after you're already in a relationship. We're all familiar with the phenomenon of the “friend-zone.” It's the unfortunate state in which two friends are mismatched in their romantic intentions: One remains content being friends, while the other wants more.
A study that examined why people maintain friendships with exes found four reasons: security (emotional support, advice, trust), practicality (shared possessions or finances), civility, and unresolved romantic desires.
Under no circumstances should a relationship that was abusive, manipulative or toxic transition into a friendship, Sussman says. But even if your relationship was generally healthy and simply didn't work out, you might want to think twice before becoming pals.
The no-contact rule refers to cutting off all contact with an ex following a breakup, and it's the best method for moving on from an ex. No contact should last for a minimum of 60 days, and it includes no texting, no calling, and no interacting on social media.
The psychology of no contact on dumper is a coping mechanism to help you think hard about what went wrong and how you could be a better person and a potentially better partner to the next person who will come along. Instead of thinking about your ex, you have to focus on self-improvement and healing.
Silence speaks volumes
The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.