A study showed that unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery. Divorce or separation is likely the best outcome in a destructive marriage.
Statistics show that many people find increased levels of joy after their divorce. In fact, more than 50% of those surveyed reported feeling happier two years after their split.
While some may be happier after a divorce, research indicates most adults that divorce have lower levels of happiness and more psychological distress compared to married individuals. Divorce can bring up new conflicts between couples that cause more tension than when they were married.
Did you know that as many as 10% to 15% of all divorced couples will reconcile their relationship according to research?
Regret is actually part of the bargaining stage, where you negotiate how you will be different in order to save the relationship. Nonetheless, grieving itself does not mean that the person regrets their decision, it just means that they are going through the process of letting go.
Of the 715 divorced men and women polled, 27 percent admitted to sleeping with their exes after their divorce or separation. Sex with an ex may seem problematic -- can you ever really move on from someone if you're still getting it on?
The study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of 12 separate measures of psychological well-being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery.
Shame is one of the most toxic emotions associated with divorce. And people feel it for all sorts of reasons. Some people feel shame for “failing” at their marriages or putting on a brave face for too long. Others feel shame for being unfaithful, or for having a partner that was unfaithful to them.
Divorce is better than a toxic marriage because it will help you bring the focus on yourself. When the focus is back, you will start prioritizing yourself and doing things that make you mentally and physically stronger.
Statistics show that while women initiate divorce almost twice the rate that men do, women are also much more likely to greatly struggle financially after divorce. This is particularly true if children are involved.
Divorce puts a strain on the financial, social, and emotional relationships of the partners. This time particularly can be devastating for women who may lose confidence, be forced into custody issues, and may lose hope of ever finding happiness again. Some women find it hard to return to their normal self again.
A Healthier Household
That's why one of the most prominent positive outcomes of divorce is it creates a healthier household environment for everybody involved. It also shows children that divorce does not necessarily need to be a negative event.
Divorce with school-aged kids (5 to 13 years old)
The school-aged years are probably the worst age for divorce for children; the potential for emotional trauma from divorce is highest at age 11.
It has remained at around this percentage in recent years, shifting slightly higher, to 48%, in 2021. The general declining trend is partly due to the rise in divorces of long-term marriages where children are already grown up.
Studies also have shown that children do better when their parents get divorced, in comparison to their parents living together in a continuous state of conflict, instability, argumentation, hatred, and uncertainty.
Loneliness. Many people say that the loneliness is the hardest part. It takes a very long time to get used to being single. Not only have you lost your partner, and perhaps your best friend, but you have possibly also lost your in-laws and the extended family that you married into.
Perhaps the most difficult period of divorce is the “separation period.” That is the time between when you decide to get a divorce, and the date when you are actually divorced.
It's a process that's extremely tough from start to finish, and you can still feel emotional weeks, months, and even years after you and your former partner have split. The residual anger, hurt, confusion, depression, and even self-blame don't just disappear once a divorce is finalized.
Grieving a divorce is a process, much like grieving a death. You'll likely pass through a series of five stages, similar to Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross' five stages of grieving death or loss.
A recent study of Census Data, and survey conducted by Mixbook of 3,000 Americans has provided insights into how many people who are married across the U.S feel that they are happy in their relationship. The study found that overall (on average), 74%, or about 98 million Americans say they are happily married.
While a divorce can be a huge emotional blow, staying in a bad marriage can be even worse. It is not fair to yourself to stay in a relationship that is not working. Life is too short to stay in an unhealthy relationship.
The average length of a first marriage that ends in divorce is roughly eight years—7.8 years for men, 7.9 for women. Moving into second marriages that end in divorce, the timeline shortens somewhat. In these cases, the median length for men is 7.3 years, while for women it drops to 6.8 years.
According to family law attorney Jamie Kurtz, the most common reason couples get back together is that they recognize and resolve the problems that plagued their marriage. If something didn't work out in your marriage, something has to change, or it won't work out when you get back together.
There might be several reasons, including minimizing disruption to the lives of the couple's children or financial conditions that may prohibit a couple from moving out on their own. In these cases, a couple may continue to share expenses, and if they have children together, they split child-rearing duties.
While there are countless divorce studies with conflicting statistics, the data points to two periods during a marriage when divorces are most common: years 1 – 2 and years 5 – 8. Of those two high-risk periods, there are two years in particular that stand out as the most common years for divorce — years 7 and 8.