One of the most obvious signs is that she wants to spend time with you and she makes every effort to do so. Maybe suggesting places to go, asking for help with something or even just singling you out to talk to when you are in a group situation.
Often autistic people find it easier to express love by doing things for their partner than by saying specific words or being physically affectionate. Doing little things for your partner shows that you care about them and want them to be happy.
Sensory hyperreactivity seems to be especially pronounced in autistic females, so much so that many claim sensory issues are the defining feature of their autism. Sensory sensitivities are hardwired in the brain, and therefore cannot be changed.
These responses are often described as a general hypersensitivity, but they are more complex than that: Sometimes autistic people crave touch; sometimes they cringe from it. For many people on the spectrum, these sensations are so intense that they take measures to shape their 'touchscape.
Because autistic people might have trouble understanding social rules, the way others deliver words, or body language, they can sometimes express their feelings inappropriately. These include attraction and romantic feelings. People on the spectrum need clear explanations of what is appropriate and what is not.
Because people with autism often have difficulty reading social cues, managing sensory needs, and expressing feelings, relationships that involve dating someone with autism spectrum disorder someone can be particularly challenging to navigate.
Ultimately, what may make a relationship very challenging and stressful for a woman with autism is indirect communication and sarcasm. Likewise, their desire to communicate in a direct way may make their partners uncomfortable. Often autistic teens and adults say what comes to their mind.
Some believe that autistic people aren't interested in romantic relationships or aren't capable of romantic love. However, this is far from the truth. In fact, autistic people can make wonderful partners.
Girls in general engage to a greater degree in fantasy and imaginary play than boys. They are less occupied generally with banging, hitting, slamming and throwing things than boys. With autism their play may be repetitive but not raise suspicions if it remains in the realms of gender specific toys and activities.
They may show love, for example, through a practical act, and tidy up for you, or iron your shirt, rather than through a more neurotypical way of looking at you and telling you or using physical affection.
People with autism often experience love differently from neurotypical people. Their expression of love is less straightforward, as they tend to rely heavily on non-verbal communication. This can mean that those who are neurotypical may find it difficult to interpret the signs of affection.
Unique shows of affection
People with autism may show their love by: sharing their special interest. allowing someone into their space. using alternative forms of communication.
Widespread stereotypes suggest that people with autism are incapable of feeling romantic love. In reality, people with autism can experience romantic love and often attach considerable value to their close relationships.
Many people with autism crave intimacy and love. But, they don't know how to achieve it in a romantic relationship. They can feel blind to everyday subtle social cues from their partner. This can cause conflict and hurt feelings.
People with autism may get easily attached to people, leading them to become over-friendly. It can be difficult to understand other people's perceptions of situations, therefore what they feel is appropriate, may be considered as socially unacceptable.
Autistic children commonly avoid social touch more than non-autistic peers. It is generally thought that this is due to autistic individuals experiencing hyper- or hyposensitivity of touch.
Many autistic people experience hypersensitivity to bright lights or certain light wavelengths (e.g., LED or fluorescent lights). Certain sounds, smells, textures and tastes can also be overwhelming. This can result in sensory avoidance – trying to get away from stimuli that most people can easily tune out.
A person with Asperger's may not notice your subtle hints when flirting. You may be using your best “moves,” and they could go unnoticed. “Sometimes, they don't know when someone is interested in them or flirting with them unless someone is very explicit,” Mendes explained. This doesn't mean they aren't interested.
While many children with autism feel averse to hugging, some children with autism like to be hugged. Some children can swing the opposite way and want so many hugs that they feel hug deprived when they aren't getting enough.