So, you shouldn't argue with a narcissist because it gives them an opportunity to manage their painful thoughts, feelings, and emotions by projecting them onto you and destroying your self-esteem.
Divorce attorney Derek Jacques of The Mitten Law Firm told Insider it's "hard to bite your tongue" when a narcissist is "spewing insults your way." "However, it is best to avoid engaging with them on their level," he said. "Be aware that narcissists don't argue to prove a point.
What happens if you don't argue with a narcissist?
Essentially, narcissists thrive on using others as a source to make them feel important, loved, cherished. If you ignore a narcissist and deny them their source, they may become enraged and try even harder for your attention – especially in ways that can be toxic or abusive.
Narcissists will often try to redirect the conversation if they feel like they're being criticized or they don't like what's being said. In many cases, this redirection will go toward putting you down or blaming you for something.
They always want to keep other people on their toes. Mixing things up makes them unpredictable, and they thrive on others feeling nervous around them. If you really want the narcissist to go away, you have to ignore them indefinitely. You have to end all contact with them- or go as low-contact as possible.
While it is completely understandable, it is a dangerous approach because it can cause people to use ineffective techniques, like the silent treatment, against the narcissist in their life. The silent treatment is one of the most ineffective techniques that you could use on the narcissist in your life.
Simply put, narcissists hate being ignored. They probably want to make you feel ashamed, regretful, and rattled. They want to be in control and will go to any length to keep feeling empowered. It's critical to understand that a narcissist will not leave you alone the first time you ignore them.
The best way to deal with a narcissist is to ignore them. By doing this, you take away their power and control. Narcissists thrive on attention and need constant validation. If you can learn to ignore them, they will eventually get the message that you're not going to put up with their behavior and move on.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
Although narcissists act superior to others and posture as beyond reproach, underneath their grandiose exteriors lurk their deepest fears: That they are flawed, illegitimate, and ordinary.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
What happens when you do silent treatment with a narcissist?
To Maintain Control
Because of this, a narcissist will revert to any manipulation tactics they think will give them the most control over people and their situation. If you react most to the silent treatment, they will continue to use this tactic to get the reaction they want from you.
Is it possible to beat a narcissist at his own game?
But it is possible to win against a narcissist. The best way to win is to disengage and give the narcissist nothing to use against you. Go no contact and don't give into their love bombing or fauxpologies.
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.
