Adults should not lie to children about Santa. When a child asks the question as to whether Santa is real or not, they're already at a developmental stage to distinguish between reality and fictional characters.
To perpetuate the Santa myth, parents must lie to their kids. To buoy belief, adults often stage elaborate deceptions, laying traps for the child's developing intellect. The myth encourages lazy parenting and promotes unhealthy fear. The myth makes kids more acquisitive, not less so.
Although the Santa sham is meant to bring magic to kids' holidays, parents should not lie to their children about Santa because it improperly incentivizes good behavior while ensuring disappointment and broken trust upon discovery.
“Small, occasional lies are fine, but don't go overboard or really deceive your kids.” So while it's universally held that honesty is the best policy, when it comes to parenting, sometimes telling little lies is a close second.
In 2019, House Method surveyed more than 4,500 families across the United States, and found the overall average age for no longer believing in Santa Claus is 8.4 years old. (But it varies by state: Kids in Mississippi generally believe until they're 10, while kids in Oregon stop believing at 7.)
Ethical Issues With Lying
In general, lying is considered to be immoral. The philosopher Immanuel Kant once claimed that lying was always immoral because it is manipulative and disrespects the natural rights of others to make their own decisions.
"It's not an overnight shift in thinking," says Laura Lamminen, Ph. D., a pediatric psychologist at Children's Health℠, "and there's no set age where children should know the truth about Santa Claus." Dr. Lamminen says each family and each child within that family will be ready to talk about Santa at different ages.
Adults should not lie to children about Santa. When a child asks the question as to whether Santa is real or not, they're already at a developmental stage to distinguish between reality and fictional characters.
Research shows that kids who are lied to by their parents are more likely to lie themselves, so it is always a good idea to tell the truth if possible. Don't use Santa as a tool for motivating your kid. Letting them grow through fantasy and imagination is positive.
"There is no such thing as being too old to believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy," Kelman tells Yahoo Life. "Letting kids figure it out on their own is preferable to parents breaking the news to them.
Believing in Santa is not only harmless fun, it can actually help children as their brains develop, experts say.
Santa is real in the sense that he was an actual person. Otherwise known as Saint Nicholas, his story goes all the way back to the 3rd century. He was a monk who was born in 280 A.D. in modern-day Turkey. As an only child, he was given great affection by his parents.
New survey looks at how former children feel about being lied to by parents about Santa. 72 percent of former believers keep the Santa myth alive for their own kids. At press time, about 1,200 people have taken the survey.
Coulson's advice, “I would suggest letting your child believe in Santa when they're young and when they first start asking questions, encourage them to think about it critically.” He makes an excellent point, “No child is going to hate Christmas if you let them figure out the truth on their own.
There is no need for Christians to reject him," said Carol Myers, founder of the St. Nicholas Center in Holland, Michigan. "Because the Incarnation is such a wonderful and amazing event, it makes sense that it would be celebrated in all kinds of ways, including ways that just add to the joy of the season.
Research shows that the vast majority of American parents promote a false belief in Santa Claus, and most small children accept that story as real. In fact, research shows that most parents work very hard to perpetuate the myth of Santa.
If you think your child has it all figured out, it's a good idea to be truthful. For instance, you could explain that Saint Nicholas was, in fact, a real person from long ago. He was known for leaving presents for the children in his village and for caring for the less fortunate.
Lying is generally perceived as unethical behaviour. Depending on the moral theory used, lying in special circumstances (for example, “white” lies or lies that benefit others or avert harm) might be morally justifiable.
The three most commonly referred to are lies of commission, lies of omission, and lies of influence, aka character lies. The reading below neatly summarizes these and provides some examples.
And for all intents and purposes, the Elf on the Shelf is real. It's a real doll, after all. The real question is, though, do you think the Elf on the Shelf is real? And I'm here to tell you that, yes, it is.
Nicholas was a real man. He was a bishop, living in the 3rd century, in what's now modern-day Turkey. Professor Adam English of Campbell University in North Carolina pieced together the life of St. Nicholas in his new book, The Saint Who Would Be Santa Claus: The True Life and Trials of Nicholas of Myra.
In fact, when Civil War cartoonist Thomas Nast drew Santa Claus for Harper's Weekly in 1862, Santa was a small elflike figure who supported the Union. Nast continued to draw Santa for 30 years, changing the color of his coat from tan to the red he's known for today.