Relationships within the workplace are more common than you might think. Studies show that 58% of employees have engaged in a romantic relationship with a colleague, and a surprising 72% of those over 50 years old have been romantically involved with a co-worker.
"It's totally fine to have a crush on a coworker, but it's all about how you handle it," she explains. Before you offer up your heart and soul, know whether doing so could put your career in jeopardy. If it can, you might want to try some dating apps instead.
"While you do not have a say in who your coworkers are, chances are that you will have common interests." He added that working in an office gives you the opportunity to get to know someone in a way that you don't manage to as easily on "swipe right" dating apps.
IRL, too, crushing on a coworker is common: One recent survey found that half of workers in the United States have dated a colleague — mostly peers (70%) but also their supervisors (18%) and subordinates (21%).
They Shower You with Compliments And Praises
Pay attention to the compliments and praises your coworker gives you. They may frequently praise your work, skills, or accomplishments. Additionally, they might compliment your appearance or style.
If you notice that your coworker always makes it a priority to take breaks with you, they probably like you a little more than as a friend. This is especially true if they offer to take you out or buy you lunch a lot, too. There's a reason your coworker likes talking to you when you're not working!
As per their study, light-hearted flirtation and banter among colleagues is benign and can, in fact, help relieve stress in workers. But one needs to be careful. There's a fine line between casual flirting and sexual harassment. You certainly don't want to come across as creepy.
Though often conceived as a playful, platonic rapport between co-workers, more than half of those with a "work spouse" admitted having romantic feelings for that person. Notably, nearly 20 percent more men than women reported feelings for their "work spouse."
Set Clear And Safe Boundaries For Yourself
This will make coping much easier. Social decorum dictates that most intimacy doesn't occur in the presence of others. Design strategies that remove direct and private contact with the person. Whenever possible, interact with the person only when there are other people around.
Focus on positive distractions.
Crushes often hold our attention because we let it happen. If you turn your mind to other things, however, it will be easier to get over the crush and move on. At work, focus your mind on your tasks, and having professional interactions with your coworkers.
Work is a prime breeding ground for relationships to blossom – and there are good reasons we often fall for our colleagues, whether in person or virtually.
Avoid putting yourself in situations where you will work closely with a person you are inappropriately attracted to. Similarly, watch for signs that your coworker has feelings for you. If you find this difficult, request a transfer out of the project, or ask for another colleague to be brought in to work as a buffer.
Indeed, a survey from the summer issue of Exec magazine finds that four out of five men and half of women daydream about having sex with a colleague--some having such erotic dreams every hour.
1. More than half of employees have engaged in an office romance. Workplace romance is not an issue that impacts just a handful of rogue employees. According to the survey, produced by job site Vault.com, 58% of employees have engaged in a romantic relationship with a colleague.
It turns out, 3 in 4 people have had a romantic relationship with someone they work with, according to a poll of 1,100 employees by LiveCareer. This is “generally not a good idea,” says Brandon Smith, a career coach known as The Workplace Therapist. But the urge is understandable.
The study authors contend that men resort to workplace flirtation because they are driven by “a desire for more power-not holding power,” which corrupts their intentions with co-workers.
Do not flirt back, do not touch the person, and if he or she asks you to a one-on-one coffee or lunch, find a way to bring someone else along. It is important, especially for women, to be viewed as focused and respected in the workplace. Unfortunately, men are not viewed as negatively in these circumstances."
When someone is friendly, they will usually try to engage with you by talking to you, asking you questions, and generally being nice to you. Flirtatious people tend to do all of those things too but they also tend to: Look at you for longer (prolonged eye contact) Ask more in-depth questions.
Smiling, maintaining eye contact, and offering compliments are all signs she might like you (but keep in mind she might also just be polite). Flirting and going out of her way to touch you or spend time with you are pretty big hints that she likes you.
Hugging peers is probably okay, but only for those you do not see every day, and only if they are comfortable with it. It can be a good idea to let someone know you are a hugger and ask permission before going in for a hug. This gives him/her a chance to decline the hug if s/he is uncomfortable.
In addition to not revealing your true feelings to the "crush-ee," you also want to keep that secret locked away in the vault. It's not a piece of information you want to share with co-workers or friends in the workplace. Unfortunately, that type of news can come back to bite you.
If you suspect that an office buddy might be developing deeper feelings for you, pull back a little. Show him or her that you're only interested in friendship by inviting a third party along for lunches and avoiding hours-long online chats. Keep conversations light and work-related.