A narcissist will not try to understand your point of view because the truth of the matter is that they simply don't care. Don't bother engaging with a narcissist in any kind of serious argument because you will be emotionally drained and exhausted.
Most arguments with narcissists are a waste of time because it's not going to be possible to change their mind or get them to agree with you. Avoid them when possible.
Arguing with a narcissist can be frustrating and exhausting — you may start to feel overwhelmed or upset and need to take a break. Be warned — it's possible that the narcissist might "make fun of you, minimize you, may even accuse you of being weak or walking away from a fight," Durvasula says.
It does not matter how valid your points are, you cannot reason with a narcissist. Their version of the truth is the only one that matters, and in their deluded reality, they are always right and you are always wrong.
It's best to not to: Argue or confront. Try to not confront a narcissist directly. As difficult as it may be to constantly tiptoe around them, it can be better to manage their need to feel in charge.
“When dealing with a narcissist, you should be assertive with your boundaries and make it clear to them what those are. For example, if you are not okay with something they want you to do, tell them up front and hold your ground. Don't let them pressure you into doing it anyway.”
However, if you find yourself backed into a corner, one way to sooth a narcissist's rage is to empathize with their feelings, Greenberg said. She suggested saying something like: "You must have felt very hurt by what I did, I can understand why you are feeling that way."
If you ignore a narcissist and deny them their source, they may become enraged and try even harder for your attention – especially in ways that can be toxic or abusive. Ignoring a narcissist will enrage them because of their fragile egos. They'll feel humiliated and lash out against you to protect themselves.
Narcissistic rage occurs when a narcissist's beliefs about their perceived importance or grandiosity are confronted. In turn, they respond with extreme anger toward the perceived threat. Whether narcissistic rage results from criticism, losing control, or minor setbacks, being on the receiving end can be terrifying.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
Living with a narcissist may feel difficult, but it's possible to preserve your well-being with strong boundaries, a solid support network, and a therapist who's informed on narcissism. You may also find it useful to attend a National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) family support group in your area.
Is it ever possible to have a healthy relationship with a narcissist? If we are talking about a person who meets the criteria for NPD listed above, the answer would have to be 'no'. It's difficult to have a genuine and loving connection with someone who makes everything about themselves.
"You're a bad person." "Nobody else will ever love you." "I'm the best you'll ever have." "Have fun being alone for the rest of your life."
The most effective weapon to fend off narcissists is self-love. When you love yourself, it is more difficult for the narcissist to manipulate you and get under your skin. It will hurt them to know that you do not need them, that you are better off without them, and that you love yourself exactly as you are.
Nine times out of ten, the best response is not to respond at all. But if you have to reply, the goal is to do so in a way that makes them see you differently. Right now, they see you as a source of narcissistic supply, someone they can rile up or rely on for attention (negative or positive).
They can know they're hurting your feelings, but as long as it elevates their status, they may not care. Someone living with narcissism does cry. They can feel regret, remorse, and sadness. These emotions, however, don't often have roots in empathy.
It comes hand-in-hand with this that narcissists hate being criticised or called out. Which is exactly why there's one word in particular narcissistic people cannot stand: "no".
There are many words people high in narcissism don't want to hear, but perhaps the worst involve a “no,” as in “No, you can't," "No, you're wrong," or — even worse — “No, I won't.” This makes it difficult to go about your ordinary business with the people in your life who don't understand the give-and-take of normal ...
Narcissists love attention, validation, and power. So what drives a narcissist crazy? Simply put, anything that jeopardizes their basic needs for superiority can quickly irritate them. If you want to know how to infuriate a narcissist, you can look no further than giving them nothing.
Type As can also be dangerous to narcissists
Although they can be targeted, type A people can also become a narcissist's worst nightmare. One of the most important defenses against dark personalities is having strong boundaries yourself, and type A people are usually aware they have the right to build them.