Separation means the ending of an intimate partner relationship. This includes the end of a marriage, defacto relationship or other personal relationships. It is often a difficult time, and you may feel unsure about what to do next. This section provides information and support for people whose relationship is ending.
Separation can allow you to tackle various aspects of the divorce process, such as establishing a child custody arrangement and dividing marital property, more calmly. Without court fees and timelines hovering over their heads, spouses may find navigating these legal disputes significantly easier during separation.
A legal separation is a way of separating without getting a divorce or dissolution - it's also known as a 'judicial separation. It lets you and your partner make formal decisions about things like your finances and living arrangements, but you'll still be married or in a civil partnership.
That said, reconciliation after a legal separation is not especially common. According to U.S. statistics, 87 percent of couples who legally separate eventually get a divorce, while only 13 percent choose to come back together.
A recent study concluded that while the vast majority of married couples who separate will eventually divorce (within three years), approximately 15% remain separated indefinitely, even past the 10-year mark.
Occasionally and against the odds, some couples are able to reconcile after a period of separation. Statistics based on couples getting back together after a separation show that while 87% of couples finally end their relationship in divorce after a separation, the remaining 13% are able to reconcile post-separation.
The average age for newly married couples going through their first divorce in the United States is 30 years old. About 34% of all divorces initiate spouses aged 25 to 29.
Statistically, 80% of couples who enter a marital separation end up divorcing. And, on average, they remain separated for three years before finalizing their divorce. On the other hand, 10% of those who separate end up reuniting, on average within two years.
The decision to end a relationship is even harder if there are children involved. Over the years, working with client's has informed how I can best help them. I have also noted that client's have shown five distinct emotional stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Acceptance. The final stage is acceptance and is the point where you are no longer looking back and will stop trying to retrieve the life you once had.
The majority of men and women in this study mentioned affective dimensions of their marriage relationship - encompassing communication problems, incompatibility, changed lifestyle desires and instances of infidelity - as the main reason for their divorce.
The study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of 12 separate measures of psychological well-being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery.
They have disconnected, no longer spend time together, no longer communicate with each other and don't support each other. If it feels like you are no longer a team, consistently better to be away from each other than together and you have disengaged from the relationship, it may be time to call it a day.
Both ex-spouses take a loss, but typically, men suffer a larger hit to their standard of living than women — between 10 and 40% — due to alimony and child support responsibilities, the need for a separate place to live, an extra set of household furniture and other expenses.
Statistical research shows that the average length of separation before reconciliation is six to eight months. Thus, it is a safe period when the spouses can cool off and decide whether they want to give their marriage another chance or get a divorce.
The Cons of a Legal Separation
Disadvantages of legal separation include: The inability to legally remarry; Extra cost if you later decide to divorce; and. Lack of a no-fault option.
Women are more likely to initiate separation than men
Thirty per cent of separations were initiated jointly with 70 per cent of separations initiated unilaterally by either the husband or wife.
A study led by the American Sociological Association determined that nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women. And the percentage of college-educated American women who initiated divorce is even higher.
In 2020, 49,510 divorces were granted in Australia, an increase of 1.9% from 2019. Since 2000 the divorce rate has decreased from 2.6 divorces granted per 1000 people to 1.9 in 2020 [2]. Divorces are generally only granted after a period of 12 months or more of separation.
There Is No Emotional Intimacy Between You
Over time you become disengaged, spending more time alone, at work, with the kids, or with other friends than you do with your spouse. The two of you become more like roommates and co-parents rather than a married couple.
To give yourselves the best chance of emerging from a separation period on amicable terms, you both need to commit to open and honest communications. Effective communication can help prevent the types of misunderstandings, wrongful accusations, and the “blame game” that often occurs during separations.
Statistics show that while 87 percent of separated couples end their relationship in divorce, the remaining 13 percent are able to reconcile post-separation.