Researchers found that participants who ignored an unlikable person or talked with someone likable did better on the task than those who were forced to converse with a jerk or snub a nice guy. Rebuffing a likable person and exchanging pleasantries with someone obnoxious both took a toll.
Silence is the power to mindfully choose to stay out of the negative space, and not to say hurtful words back. It takes true strength to hold your tongue and not succumb to negative energy. With time and practice, it will become easier and easier to ignore negative comments and continue on happily with your day.
To some, it may appear weak. But silence is a valid form of response, and frankly, sometimes, it's the very best way to communicate. Consider the following situations. Talking with a friend who is grieving, going through a divorce, or dealing with sickness.
During an argument, taking a moment of silence can allow both parties to calm down and collect their thoughts. This can prevent the situation from escalating and allow for a more productive conversation. Additionally, silence can be used to show empathy and understanding.
Silence creates an environment conducive to focus and concentration, allowing you to perform tasks more effectively. One of the major reasons why silence has become an important part of everyday life is the ability to focus as the modern world and its various noises enter your brain all at once.
Silence speaks volumes when they don't recognize, acknowledge, or refuse to understand. It's the loudest sound there is when words do not adequately express thoughts to deaf ears. It speaks through the hurt when it's too painful to talk. It lets them know they've hurt you, not even sure if they are aware or even care.
Research has found that people who received the silent treatment experienced a threat to their needs of belonging, self-esteem, control, and meaningful existence. This type of behavior reinforces the feeling that someone we care about wants nothing to do with us. It can feel as though you don't exist.
Silence speaks volumes
The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.
“Staying silent can often be beneficial to you, and other times it can be beneficial to those around you.” Expressing your opinion is a valuable skill. There are many situations where speaking up is the best thing we can do for ourselves and for others.
Being silent allows us to channelise our energies. It gives us the clarity to face adversities calmly and think clearly. Intentional silence also cultivates more awareness within us.
Silence intensifies the impact of trauma, and trauma that goes unspoken, un-witnessed, and unclaimed too often "outs itself" as more violence to self or others.
Being ignored is especially difficult for a person who is isolated by abuse and coercive control, and depends on the abuser's approval to feel worthwhile and safe. Many abuse survivors say they hated the silent treatment more than the insults or yelling.
Silence is not an absence of communication, it is an important communication tool. We rarely talk about the power of silence as a tool for effective communication. Silence is not just an absence of noise; it can be as important as speech as part of communication.
If you were to use the silent treatment against the narcissist in your life, you would be making it very easy for them to manipulate you into a negative interaction because you wouldn't be making conscious and well-informed decisions.
When you practice solitude and silence, you allow your brain to process your emotions, rather than suppressing them and remaining on autopilot. You may feel some uncomfortable emotions through this process, but the sooner you recognize and address your feelings, the sooner you can move forward in health and freedom.
Scripture tells us that silence can help us avoid sinning (Proverbs 10:19), gain respect (Proverbs 11:12), and is deemed wise and intelligent (Proverbs 17:28). In other words, you may be blessed by holding your tongue. Ultimately, refraining from speaking in certain situations means we are practicing self-control.
When you're angry seems to be when you want to speak the most, doesn't it? You have something to say! This is one of those times when you should stay silent. Speaking when you're angry opens the door to sin, causes strife and turns you into a fool (Proverbs 29:11).
While using silence sometimes is just a short-term way to cool down, the silent treatment becomes a problem when it's used as a deliberate strategy to inflict pain and establish control. That treatment is never okay.
The best revenge is to love each other
Know that they do not define you. Love your life with all the moments whether they are sad or smiling. Everything. Believe that you are exactly where you need to be.
The sweetest revenge for evil behavior is kindness in return. This idea is as infectious as acting harshly to those who mistreat us or others.
The silent treatment might be employed by passive personality types to avoid conflict and confrontation, while strong personality types use it to punish or control. Some people may not even consciously choose it at all.
If someone displays unmanageable emotions and easily flies off the handle, this is a serious red flag. Responding with uncontrollable rage or the "silent treatment" could point to abusive (physical or emotional) behavior in the future, says Trombetti.
Using the silent treatment is an unproductive way of communicating within a relationship. It can sometimes be a form of self-protection, but at other times, it indicates emotional abuse. People who regularly use or experience the silent treatment should take steps to address it.
We ought not remain silent when facing injustice and abuse but “speak truth to power.” We should not remain silent when witnessing wrongdoing. In those circumstances, silence is not morally acceptable; we have a duty to speak up. Remaining silent also can represent a risk.