You need to know yourself and respect your personal timing," Walfish says. Try dating again when you're ready, and in the meantime, it's fine to stay in touch with your ex via text; just make sure they aren't rejecting you or causing you any pain.
For a typical breakup, wait at least 30 days to text your ex-girlfriend. According to the famous no contact rule, 30 days is enough time for both of you to get in a better headspace and healthily process your feelings.
Well, it's worth it to message your ex telling him that you miss him just if you are on the same page. If you know the reason why you are doing it and if you need to give closure, do it. It's worth it if you see that there is a chance to reconcile the relationship.
You may want to wait at least 30 days before you speak to your ex after a breakup. You might wait longer if you were together for a few years or more and broke up. Often, a few months to a year can be a suitable amount of time to wait for many individuals.
Though you may want to put the phone down and move on, severing contact with an ex is easier said than done. Continuing to text your ex after a breakup is like picking at a wound — it hurts and keeps you from healing, but it's also strangely addictive. It is possible, however, to rewire your heart and habits.
By texting your ex that you miss them, you're letting them know that you want them back. You might think it is a nice gesture to melt their heart, but honestly, it will only push them further away from you.
Distancing yourself from your ex gives you space to explore your emotions, gives you the time to process the hurt, gives you perspective, and more, which eventually allows you to move on from the heartbreak. Forget what guys feel when their ex ignores them or what anyone feels when they are cut off by their ex.
If you just want to apologize and make peace, a text exchange might be sufficient, especially if you think seeing each other face to face again might be too hard or too confusing. But if you want to discuss the possibility of getting back together, that's probably a conversation best had in person.
“No contact” could make him question what he thought he did right. He'll doubt everything from his attractiveness and bedroom skills to his jokes and romantic gestures. He might fixate on every little error he made while you were together, adding to his feelings of regret and insecurity.
Bhonsle says, “When the no-contact rule after the breakup is in force, a man might go through anger, humiliation, and fear, sometimes all at once. Depending on the time of day, the man could feel any of these individual emotions or all of them together.”
So, a few weeks to two months is the answer to the question, “How long does it take for a guy to miss you?” Typically, men realize what they lost when they can't find a woman with their personality. By then, they learn not all women are the same, and they shouldn't have broken off the relationship.
Express what you did wrong, say you're sorry, and wish them well moving forward. You might even be able to get some shared closure on the breakup. “I've been thinking a lot about what happened between us, and I'm sorry for how I acted. You didn't deserve that.”
You need to keep in mind however that this actually depends on a few factors including how long you were in the relationship, how much he liked/loved you, the reason you split up and so on. For the most part, he WILL miss you and will want you back if you work the situation to your advantage.
Give it a few days (or even a week).
Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing. If you've waited more than a week and still haven't heard back from him, it might be time to move on.
"Most people need a month or two to process the breakup, to mourn, and to integrate lessons before jumping back in if they were in a fairly serious relationship," she says. If you dated someone for a year or more, you may need three to four months.
Message him if you want to. It's your life, you don't need to wait for someone to validate you. If you feel he's not serious and you are after you talked to him, you still have plenty of time to dump him and be sure about your decision.
The male mind during no contact
The no-contact rule male psychology forces him to recognize his loneliness. After a breakup, if you stop contacting him, he will feel free and enjoy this phase as much as he can. But, with time, the loneliness and guilt pang will start to kick in.
Roughly 4 weeks of time alone should be enough to get back into the normal rhythm of the single life. It might feel messy and strange at first, but after 30 days you may find yourself feeling much better. While 30 days is a good rule of thumb, everybody is different.
Men often go through an emotional state called “Dumpers Remorse” after the woman finally goes away. This state hits after one month to six weeks after the man passes through the initial happy phase after a breakup. He starts to give away signs he knows he messed up the whole thing from that time.
It's unlikely that an ex will forget about you, even if you don't communicate with them after the breakup. Relationships tend to make an large emotional impact on both people involved, so it's likely your ex will remember you and the relationship even after the breakup.
There is no easy way to deal with a breakup, but remaining silent actually speaks volumes to your ex. After all, actions speak louder than words! By staying silent, you're telling your ex that you're strong, resilient, and independent. You're relying on yourself — and no one else — for your own happiness.
Some people may think that ignoring your ex is the best revenge. This allows them to wonder about you since they don't see you checking up on them, and you may be fine without them. In general terms, having no contact at all for at least 30 days after a breakup can give ignoring your ex the best chance at working.
Silence speaks volumes
The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.