Try explaining the exact words they used that hurt you, but express your hurt feelings calmly rather than with anger. It's totally OK to be angry, but when communicating with your partner, it might be easier to get your message across if you can avoid lashing out at them.
Create a safe, non-judgemental, and loving space, and speak your pain. it requires grace on your part to give him the opportunity to hear what you have to say, and time to process his own pain and anger with himself for having hurt you.
If someone treats you poorly and you just let it go, you've taught them that it's okay to treat you this way. But make no mistake: it is okay to feel hurt and it is okay to tell someone they hurt you. At Stenzel Clinical, we've seen what happens when pain is bottled up.
Most men who initiate breakups or hurt their partners through their actions or words do eventually experience remorse over losing their beloved. Ultimately, your man will likely realize the flaws in his behavior and actions. Men do painfully come to terms with the harsh reality that they've lost a very special lady.
Another one of the biggest undeniable signs he feels guilty for hurting you is that he cares what you feel. What is this? He's not doing that thing where he nods while you talk, or leaves your messages on read. He answers back, makes eye contact, offers a kind word and really wants to know if you're OK.
If the person knows we are being hurt and doesn't care, the best is to forgive (to not feel pressured or guilty if we do care about this person), but also to keep distance in order to avoid future problems. Also, we must make sure we are communicating our concern in a clear and honest way. Time heals.
When a man hurts a woman he loves, he feels emotions such as anger, guilt, frustration, self-loathe, fear, etc. Although he may not express his feelings confidently, a man will show signs he is sorry for hurting you or signs he knows he hurt you.
Stand up for your truth without feeling guilty.
Some people may be offended or shocked that you call them out for hurting you and violating your boundaries. If this happens, don't feel guilty and don't let that stop you. You deserve to stand up for yourself and your emotional well-being.
One of the most direct ways to learn how to make him regret ignoring you is by being upfront about it. Be honest about how his behavior towards you is making you feel. Let him know that being taken for granted, ignored for long periods, or rejected made you feel bad.
“I want to tell you what hurts me more than the fact that you cheated on me. It's how you still claim to love me. It's not love when you cheat on someone more than once. You made a conscious decision to betray me.
In such cases, men are always aware of their actions. They'll rarely say what they feel, but there will always be some signs a guy knows he messed up. By trying to understand how a man feels when he hurts a woman's feelings, you can recognize the reason for his insecurity in the relationship.
He won't want to bring it up or talk about whatever he did because he hopes you will forget about it. On the other hand, if he's done something bad and now he feels uncomfortable being around you because of all that guilt, he may lash out in other ways. He may be ruder, he may pick more fights, etc.
He says hurtful things because he feels a sense of power when you get upset. Because in all probability, he's had toxic parents who threw hurtful words at each other. Your boyfriend says hurtful things when angry because he is unable to control his anger or his words.
Men often go through an emotional state called “Dumpers Remorse” after the woman finally goes away. This state hits after one month to six weeks after the man passes through the initial happy phase after a breakup. He starts to give away signs he knows he messed up the whole thing from that time.
Set a time to talk to them when you are both calm. Be honest about your feelings and the fact that their actions hurt you. One step might be to describe to the other person what you are feeling and subsequently describe how you would better receive information. It is important to do this in a non-accusatory manner.
Word to Express Hurt
Consider saying something like, "When you said that it made me feel very small" or "I feel like my trust has been betrayed."