If they refuse to use the toilet or potty, don't force them. Leave it until they are willing to try again. If one week goes by without any success, postpone all attempts and try again a few weeks later. Remember it is not a race or a test.
Don't Force the Issue
If your child refuses to go, forcing them to go and sit on the potty will likely create a negatively charged atmosphere and can ultimately lead to more resistance.
Potty training success hinges on physical, developmental and behavioral milestones, not age. Many children show signs of being ready for potty training between ages 18 and 24 months. However, others might not be ready until they're 3 years old. There's no rush.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents avoid pushing their children into potty training too early, beginning only when a toddler shows signs of interest, such as becoming excited to use the bathroom and sensing she has to go to the bathroom prior to actually soiling her diaper.
Once they are potty trained, you can eventually shift them to the toilet seat. But do not force them to do it. Instead, let them take their time to adjust to it. Furthermore, being patient and persistent during the process will make this transition period easier for you and your child.
Remember, there is no hard timeframe for when kids potty train. Even if your child is 3 years old, they still might not be ready to potty train. All kids develop at different paces, but if you have concerns or questions, you can always talk to a health care provider.
They're Not Ready
Some children are not developmentally ready to learn yet, while others resist attempts to learn as a means of control. Difficulty potty training may also be caused by a medical issue, such as chronic constipation.
The reasons often are behavioral. A child might be fearful of anything from falling into the toilet to losing a part of themselves (yes, some children can be possessive of their bodily secretions). It's possible a child might feel some embarrassment about going to the bathroom.
“The most common reason a potty-trained child suddenly refuses to use the toilet is that the child experienced 'force,' or too much pressure, by his parents,” says Dr. Walfish.
The frustrating journey of toilet training a child is a struggle every parent faces. Starting kids down this path early can be tempting, but a new study from Wake Forest University found that pushing the topic too soon – or too late – can cause physical problems and lead to wetting accidents.
Establish a routine. For example, you may want to begin by having your child sit on the potty after waking with a dry diaper, or 45 minutes to an hour after drinking lots of liquids. Only put your child on the potty for a few minutes a couple of times a day, and let your child get up if he or she wants to.
Constipated toddlers typically poop less than two times a week. Their poop is hard, dry and painful to pass. Constipation most frequently occurs due to a low-fiber diet, dehydration, changes in routine or resistance to toilet training.
The average age toilet training begins in the United States is between 2 and 3 years of age. Most children in the United States are bowel and bladder trained by 4 years of age. However, toilet training can begin as soon as parents and children want to start.
Remind yourself that sooner or later, your child will want to be dry for their own sake. If they start to see potty training as a battle with you, it'll be much harder. Leave the potty training for a month or so, then try again, slowly and calmly. A reward chart with stickers may help your child stay motivated.
Most children complete potty training by 36 months. The average length it takes toddlers to learn the process is about six months. Girls learn faster, usually completing toilet training two to three months before boys do.
Ways to overcome potty training resistance. Make it your child's choice. Let him know he can switch to big boy underwear or Pull-Ups and use the potty whenever he wants to, and that you're there to help when he asks. Then give it a rest and don't talk about it for a while.
Only 60 percent of children have achieved mastery of the toilet by 36 months, the study found, and 2 percent remain untrained at the age of 4 years.
Most children will complete toilet training and be ready to stop using diapers between 18 and 30 months of age,1 but this certainly isn't the case for all kids. Some children are not fully out of diapers until after the age of 4.
Signs your child is not ready for potty training
Your child is still having bowel movements during sleep. Your child has a genuine fear of the toilet and is afraid to use the bathroom without a diaper on. Your child starts to withhold pee and poop for a long amount of time, to the point where it's uncomfortable.
Tips for Potty Training Boys. Developmental research suggests that boys' brains develop differently than girls and learning often takes on different forms for boys than for girls. In essence, boys need to try and do the same activity over and over, in order to learn.
Potty training resistance is most commonly seen in shy kids who feel all this growing up is just happening too darn fast. Cautious kids who start to feel out of control will begin to resist, too.