Signs of a midlife crisis in women can range from changes in body image or sexual satisfaction (often due to factors such as perimenopause or menopause) to emotional struggles surrounding career issues or dissatisfaction.
It happens anywhere from 40 years old to 60 years old and affects men and women. A midlife crisis is not a disorder but is mainly psychological. It occurs when someone looks at where they are in life compared to where they think they should be by a certain age.
Midlife, the period of the lifespan between younger and older adulthood, has been described as a period of transition in women's lives. Investigators studying midlife have focused on women 40 to 65 years of age, who typically experience multiple social, psychological and biological transitions.
Symptoms of a midlife crisis may include depression or anxiety, irritability or mood swings, sleep disturbances, weight gain or loss, increased indecisiveness and more.
Women's midlife crises, however, are often the culmination of a multitude of co-occurring stressors, including health or medical issues, holding caregiving roles both for children and for aging parents, and losses related to death or divorce.
A recent study shows that midlife, the age range that spans between 40 and 65, can be quite tumultuous for women. During this time, women are not only dealing with biological changes, but they're also dealing with work problems, family issues, death, securing finances and reaching personal goals.
Carl Jung (1875–1961), in his extensive writings, identified five stages associated with an innate, normal, and expected midlife transition: accommodation, separation, liminality, reintegration, and individuation.
The regret of most individuals experiencing midlife crises has a lot to do with the disappointment that they did not live a good or full life. They feel they were untrue to themselves and lived a life based on the approval of others. Do not focus on what-ifs. This will only bring confusion and self-doubt.
The midlife crisis is more of a social phenomenon than a specific mental illness. It's a term that refers to the dissatisfaction, anxiety and feelings of depression or remorse that many men start to feel as they transition from the first part of their adult life into middle age.
For some, this becomes a significant issue that affects their relationships and careers. This crisis can affect self-concept and self-confidence, leading to changes in moods, behaviors, emotions, and relationships as people cope with the transition to midlife.
Common midlife crisis divorce regrets include: Regretting hurting loved ones. Regretting allowing emotions to guide impulsive decisions. Regretting wanting everything in life to change.
Robi Ludwig, Psy. D. and author of Your Best Age Is Now. “There's a tendency to stop and pause during midlife and question whether you're on the right track.” Symptoms of a midlife crisis for a woman may include exhibiting signs of depression and questioning long-held beliefs, expressing anger and blame.
Women initiate most of these divorces, often due to feeling unfulfilled or unsatisfied with their current lives. Other common causes include empty nest syndrome, lack of shared interests and hobbies, career dissatisfaction, depression in men going through a midlife crisis divorce and infidelity.
Thankfully, it is still possible to fix your marriage even if it has already been negatively affected by your midlife crisis. This will take time though, and it's very important that you are able to talk with your spouse and, if possible, agree on what needs to be done to repair your marriage.
But as we hit midlife, our BDNF levels have peaked and started to drop. And as Leuthardt points out, “reduced plasticity is associated with depression. So there's this perfect storm: Just when you've reached all your initial life goals and you're trying to figure out your next phase, your brain stops cooperating.”
Feeling like you're not doing anything well.
Mid-lifers will often say they feel they're they're failing on all fronts. Everything is “once over lightly”. Or they'll manage to do one thing well (like work) but be hyper-irritable and short on energy with partners and kids, which upsets them and causes guilt.
The Temptation to Withdrawal
In Midlife Crisis, this is the stage when a person begins to separate from family and friends—cutting off a true source of demonstrated love, reassurance, and appreciation. Instead, they become solitary and isolated, refusing (or not even recognizing) the help they most need.
It's difficult to anticipate whether your partner will return after a midlife crisis because every case is different. If they physically left, they may return home, but they may appear different to you or have a new outlook on life with which you may or may not agree.
You can take four steps to overcome your midlife crisis: talking to someone you trust, reframing your situation, carrying out a life audit, and setting new goals. If you're managing someone who's showing these signs, try to strike the right balance between being empathic and addressing any negative behavior directly.
Midlife change can be a good thing
Some people get divorces that leave them happier; others find new ways to connect with spouses or partners.
A midlife crisis might occur anywhere from about age 37 through the 50s, he says. By whatever term, the crisis or transition tends to occur around significant life events, he says, such as your youngest child finishing college, or a "zero" birthday announcing to the world that you're entering a new decade.