While it's not illegal for them to share, it's recommended that children over the age of 10 should have their own bedrooms – even if they're siblings or step-siblings. We know this isn't always possible. If kids are sharing, try to have regular conversations with them about how they're feeling.
Dear Concerned: It is not appropriate for parents to co-sleep with adolescent children, partly because adolescents need and deserve some privacy, as they engage in the developmentally important process of figuring out who they are and what they're about.
Co-sleeping is not recommended, but a 7-year-old child sleeping with parents is considered normal in many families and cultures. The American Association of Pediatrics (AAP) warns against co-sleeping at any age, especially if the infant is younger than four months.
Recent studies indicate that near-epidemic proportions of children are co-sleeping with parents today. According to Parenting's MomConnection, a surprising 45 percent of moms let their 8- to 12-year-olds sleep with them from time to time, and 13 percent permit it every night.
“There is nothing wrong with cuddling your eight-year-old in bed and, on occasion, sleeping with them for comfort when they're stressed or ill,” says Janet Morrison, a psychological associate from Toronto who assesses children, adolescents and families.
When's the best time to move a baby to its own room? I recommend doing it around 6-7 months. After that, infants become much more tuned in to the particulars of their surroundings and may have trouble with the change. Also, by 8 months, many babies suddenly notice—and really care—if there's no one nearby.
Basora-Rovira reminds parents that under the age of 12 months, there should be absolutely no bed-sharing. The AAP updated their sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) guidelines in 2016 to recommend room-sharing for the baby's first year, but to avoid bed-sharing due to accidental suffocation risks.
After 12 months, there is no proven risk of harm. There is no evidence that bed-sharing produces children who are more spoiled or dependent. Proven harm to parents. Several studies have shown that more than half of the children who sleep with their parents resist going to bed and awaken several times during the night.
The AAP recommends infants share a parents' room, but not a bed, "ideally for a year, but at least for six months" to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
“Ideally, children would move out of shared rooms with a sibling of the opposite sex by age six, but not every family has that option. In that case, set up some boundaries, have them change in the bathroom, or be flexible with your own room as another place to change”.
Co-sleeping with older children can be especially detrimental as it can create stress for the entire family, lead to poor sleep patterns for both parents and children, and inhibit the ability of children to develop independence.
In general, I would say that by the age of 8 or 9 years-10 at the latest-most children have developed enough of a sense of personal boundaries and body space that they no longer want to shower with a parent or bathe with a sibling of the opposite sex.
At these ages, with social, school, and family activities, bedtimes gradually become later and later, with most 12-years-olds going to bed at about 9 p.m. There is still a wide range of bedtimes, from 7:30 to 10 p.m., as well as total sleep times, from 9 to 12 hours, although the average is only about 9 hours.
Co-sleeping is a practice in which babies and young children sleep close to one or both parents, as opposed to in a separate room.
As a general guideline, Dr. Eagar advises not allowing single dating before age sixteen. “There's an enormous difference between a fourteen- or fifteen-year- old and a sixteen- or seventeen-year-old in terms of life experience,” he says.
Sleep: what to expect at 5-11 years
At 5-11 years, children need 9-11 hours sleep a night. For example, if your child wakes for school at 7 am and needs approximately 10 hours sleep per night, your child should be in bed before 9 pm. Some children fall deeply asleep very quickly when they go to bed.
Kids who suffer from daytime anxieties—about school, separation from parents, or other concerns—are more likely to fear the dark and fear sleeping alone (Gregory and Eley 2005). You may be able to reduce your child's nighttime fears by helping him cope with daytime stress.
Most kids will actually outgrow fear of the dark by ages 4 to 5, helped along with some specific strategies. But about 20% of kids will have a persistent fear of the dark. “It's not always so easy to unlearn those startled, anxious, fearful responses,” said Mabe.
DEAR CONCERNED: It is not appropriate for parents to co-sleep with adolescent children, partly because adolescents need and deserve some privacy, as they engage in the developmentally important process of figuring out who they are and what they're about.
pediatrician and consultant for Mom Loves Best who agrees that while children can begin to bathe alone around 8 or 9 years old, key safety precautions and hygiene habits are most important.
The good news is that according to the American Academy of Dermatology, kids between the ages of 6 and 11 do not require a daily bath or shower—in fact, bathing once or twice a week is fine. However, if your child is involved in sports or gets dirty, they may need a daily wash.
Children ages 6 to 11: Guidelines for bathing
If your child is in this age group, taking a daily bath is fine. However, children in this age group may not need a daily bath. Children aged 6 to 11 need a bath: At least once or twice a week.
There is no agreed-upon age when a child can stay home alone safely. Because children mature at different rates, you should not base your decision on age alone. You may want to evaluate your child's maturity and how he or she has demonstrated responsible behavior in the past.
As kids grow up they might want more privacy and need their own space, especially if they're sharing a bedroom with a brother or sister. While it's not illegal for them to share, it's recommended that children over the age of 10 should have their own bedrooms – even if they're siblings or step-siblings.