Self-importance Engaging in a whirlwind romance. Lacking compassion or a severe lack of empathy for others. Love bombing. An inability to maintain connections, such as with friends, colleagues and family members.
Toxic People, for the Most Part, Are Narcissists
Narcissists have absolutely no concerns outside of their own needs and desires. They don't care about the people around them as much as they care about themselves.
There are plenty of tell-tale signs, like self-importance, a lack of empathy, a demanding personality and an excessive need for admiration.
One of the most common ways a narcissist, especially the covert types, will try to test you is through the silent treatment. They will simply stay silent and ignore you because they want to get a rise out of you. They want you to go back to them and grovel for their forgiveness and validation.
Narcissistic partners act as if they are always right, that they know better and that their partner is wrong or incompetent. This often leaves the other person in the relationship either angry and trying to defend themselves or identifying with this negative self-image and feeling badly about themselves.
While an outward show of superiority is a definite part of the narcissistic personality, a sense of superiority (or pursuit of it) is not the central factor of the disorder. The root of the disorder is actually a strict resistance to feeling vulnerable with anyone at any time.
Narcissists tend to display exaggerated body language and facial expressions. The 1990 study on conversational narcissism also found that narcissists tend to be overly dramatic in their hand gestures and facial expressions. They may also speak in a loud tone of voice.
The most official of the narcissism tests, the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is commonly used to determine if someone displays narcissistic behaviors.
Narcissists thrive on getting attention, feeling special, and having control. He is an expert at getting an emotional reaction out of you – good or bad – because it makes him feel powerful and better than you. The best thing you can do is not react.
Narcissists are motivated by feeling superior and expanding their power, and so the only things that matter when helping others are receiving adulation, fame, influence, opportunities, notoriety, and other resources. They dont actually care about others because to them other people are just things to use.
Narcissistic rage ranges from direct confrontation with name-calling and hurtful slurs, to calculated, closed down reactions like giving their partner the silent treatment for hours at a time. "They give you the cold shoulder, or they walk out and they find another woman," Greenberg said.
Overt narcissism, also called agentic narcissism, is what you might think of as the “classic” and most obvious form of NPD. Someone experiencing overt narcissism is excessively preoccupied with how others see them.
Some narcissists lie and/or practice love-bombing by overwhelming their prey with verbal, physical, and material expressions of love. Narcissists lose interest as the expectation of intimacy increases, or when they've won at their game.
Narcissists view partners as trophies under their power and may expect partners to show deference and adoring behavior throughout the relationship. Manipulation of a partner is emotional abuse, and narcissists resort to some pretty low behaviors if they feel that they are losing their hold on a partner.
A pathological narcissist isn't in love with their true self, but rather an idealized self-image. Narcissists often manipulate through guilt. Telltale signs that you are dealing with a narcissist are when they hoard conversations, expect preferential treatment, and violate social rules.
Narcissistic Behaviour
The narcissist feeds off the attention, admiration, respect or fear they illicit through their false self. Think of a narcissist as being similar to an individual who is addicted to drugs. They are addicted to being idealised by others, the way a person might be addicted to cocaine or heroin.
Look at the narcissist, smile, and say no.
When the narcissist asks for something from you or wants you to do something, smile and say NO! Then sit back and see how they react to your boundaries.