Emotionally neglected people are directly or indirectly told their feelings and needs don't matter. The person who is doing the neglecting may be cold, detached, dismissive, intentionally stressful, or act otherwise unfairly. Emotional neglect isn't always a type of emotional abuse.
Warning Signs or Red Flags
Doesn't have enough food, proper clothing or safe shelter. Has poor hygiene, suffers from a chronic illness and/or shows signs of anxiety or depression. Describes abuse or domestic violence at home. Exhibits inappropriate sexual behaviors or knowledge for his/her age.
Examples of emotional neglect may include: lack of emotional support during difficult times or illness. withholding or not showing affection, even when requested. exposure to domestic violence and other types of abuse.
Chronic Feelings of Guilt, Shame, and Self-Blame
Most people experience guilt and shame on occasion; however, childhood emotional neglect survivors often feel these emotions consistently. The lingering trauma of emotional neglect can manifest as guilt and blame around a person's feelings and needs.
Emotional Neglect is Complex Trauma
Childhood trauma takes several forms, such as physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse and emotional neglect. Emotional neglect is complex trauma that can result in complex post traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD).
For children, affectional neglect may have devastating consequences, including failure to thrive, developmental delay, hyperactivity, aggression, depression, low self-esteem, running away from home, substance abuse, and a host of other emotional disorders. These children feel unloved and unwanted.
Physical neglect is by far the most common type of neglect. In most cases, the parent or caregiver is not providing the child with all of the basic necessities like food, clothing and shelter. In some cases, young children are left without proper supervision for extended periods of time.
Signs of Childhood Emotional Neglect in adulthood
Feelings of Emptiness (“I don't know who I am or what my purpose is”) Fear of being dependent (“I will be rejected or let down, if I trust someone”) Unrealistic Self-Appraisal – difficulty to accurately describe oneself.
Child emotional neglect (CEN) is the parent's failure to meet their child's emotional needs during the early years. It involves unresponsive, unavailable, and limited emotional interactions between that person and the child. Children's emotional needs for affection, support, attention, or competence are ignored.
Four types of neglect include physical, educational, and emotional. The difference between abuse and neglect is that abuse causes bodily harm while neglect is failure to offer care to a child or a person.
The immediate emotional effects of abuse and neglect—isolation, fear, and an inability to trust—can translate into lifelong consequences, including poor mental health and behavioral health outcomes and increased risk for substance use disorder.
Emotional Neglect, also known as Psychological Neglect, refers to a situation where a parent or caregiver does not provide the basic emotional care, attention and affection that a child needs in order to develop proper emotional well-being.
Symptoms of Unresolved Trauma
Lack of trust and difficulty opening up to other people6. Dissociation and a persistent feeling of numbness7. Control issues, to overcompensate for feeling helpless during the traumatic incident8. Low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness9.
A child who has experienced this type of trauma and holds much shame may show us behaviours such as: envy, anger, and anxiety, effects of sadness, depression, depletion, loneliness, isolation and avoidance. They will highlight to us their inadequacy, their powerlessness and at times their own self-disgust.
Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Childhood emotional neglect can also play a factor in a condition called complex PTSD (CPTSD). Indeed, any ongoing, long-term abuse and neglect can lead to this condition.
For example, abuse or neglect may stunt physical development of the child's brain and lead to psychological problems, such as low self- esteem, which could later lead to high-risk behaviors, such as substance use.
Childhood trauma in adults also results in feeling disconnected, and being unable to relate to others. Studies have shown that adults that experience childhood trauma were more likely to struggle with controlling emotions, and had heightened anxiety, depression, and anger.
“When a person's first attachment experience is being unloved, this can create difficulty in closeness and intimacy, creating continuous feelings of anxiety and avoidance of creating deep meaningful relationships as an adult,” says Nancy Paloma Collins, LMFT in Newport Beach, California.
If your daughter feels unloved, she may suffer from several emotional problems. Symptoms can include depression, anxiety, self-harm, and more. These feelings are often the result of the way her parents treated her during her childhood.