Tantrums, rage and meltdowns can mean different things for different individuals but they usually occur in three stages which are rumble, rage and recovery (diagram below).
Tantrums, rage, and meltdowns (terms that are used interchangeably) typically occur in three stages that can be of variable length. They are (a) the “rumbling” stage, (b) the “rage” stage, and (c) the “recovery” stage (Myles and Southwick, 1999).
Meltdowns happen when autistic children and teenagers feel completely overwhelmed, lose control of their behaviour, and find it very hard to calm themselves. Meltdowns are a sign of distress. Meltdowns might include behaviour like rocking, crying, hitting or withdrawing.
For some people, a meltdown may look like crying uncontrollably. For others it may look like snapping at others or lashing out angrily. And for others it may involve panicking or running away from a stressful situation.
Try to stay calm and speak in a kind, even tone. Avoid raising your voice or making fast body movements, which could further aggravate the situation.
Secondly, the term emotional breakdown can be used to describe a personal meltdown of an individual who just doesn't know how to cope with present circumstances. This can include episodes of uncontrollable weeping, withdrawal from loved ones and an inability to connect with everyday life.
Some signs that a loved one is having or nearing a meltdown may include: being irritable, which can include shouting or physical aggression. fidgeting or stimming more (repetitive movements or noises) getting frustrated over small things.
Two types of reaction are typical of autism meltdowns – an explosive reaction or a withdrawal. Explosive reactions may involve screaming, shouting, aggressive behaviour or crying. On the other hand, less explosive reactions may include refusing to communicate or interact, withdrawing themselves or shutting down.
ADHD meltdowns are sudden outbursts of frustration and anger that seem to come out of nowhere. If your child is struggling to control their emotions, there are ways to help them. For children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), impulsivity can present in many ways.
Strategies to consider include distraction, diversion, helping the person use calming strategies such as fiddle toys or listening to music, removing any potential triggers, and staying calm yourself.
Meltdowns occur when people feel overloaded. When the stimulus causing the meltdown goes away, people feel drained but return to balance rather quickly. A nervous breakdown, on the other hand, is a mental breakdown. It's more often the result of long-term psychological stress.
Tantrums usually last between two and 15 minutes. Violent tantrums that last longer than 15 minutes may be a sign of a more serious problem. If your child has lengthy, violent outbursts, talk to your healthcare provider.
Rumblings might start with a verbal plea to "go now" or visually obvious signs of distress such as hands over the ears. Meltdowns may involve intense stimming: Rumblings may include or progress to "stims" (self-stimulatory behaviors such as rocking, pacing, or finger flicking) or other signs of anxiety.
What is a sensory meltdown? Sensory meltdowns are what I consider to be extreme temper tantrums that have a sensory trigger to them. These typically involve extreme aggressive behaviors (head banging, hand biting, scratching or pushing others), and require a lot of assistance to recover.
However, autistic meltdowns are not age-related and they may happen at any age. Many autistic adults, especially the higher functioning ones, may learn some strategies to prevent meltdowns and cope with them.
Meltdowns are similar to the fight response. When an autistic person is having a meltdown they often have increased levels of anxiety and distress which are often interpreted as frustration, a 'tantrum' or an aggressive panic attack.
Being completely silent. Not being able to communicate in any way. Withdrawing to a quiet, dark space to get away from the cause of their shutdown. Not being able to move from where they are because they're thinking too much about the cause of their shutdown.
Autistic burnout vs autistic shutdown
Burnout is related to both shutdowns and meltdowns, but it is different. A meltdown or shutdown is an immediate reaction to stimuli, while burnout is more of an ongoing state.
If we scream or threaten punishment while a child is in the midst of a meltdown, their brains continue to perceive this as a threat and their amygdala goes into high gear and begins to take charge. Even telling a child to “calm down” in these moments only adds to their stress.
A meltdown is the body's and mind's response to stress, and it cannot necessarily be controlled like a tantrum. They can occur because of sensory overload. Or because an environment or situation is too stimulating, stressful, or overwhelming.
Meltdowns can come in the form of physical flailing, withdrawing from spaces and events where their peers are present, yelling, crying, kicking and more. Sensory overload can occur just about anywhere, but especially in newer environments where your child is most sensitive to the sensory information they're receiving.