Psychologist Şirin Atçeken says: “An unhealthy friend is someone who is never supportive and is maliciously competitive, or uses your success to get ahead themselves. Toxic individuals can also often lie to make themselves look better than others.
Features Unkind or Mean Behavior
Sometimes unhealthy friendships will involve mean or unkind behavior. For instance, your child's friend may be overly critical or talk badly about others. They also may laugh and make fun of other people for the way they dress, look, or act.
Toxic friends will make you feel bad, small, stressed, or uncared for in one way or another, whether it's through talking about you behind your back, subtle manipulation, codependence, or disregarding your feelings and experiences.
Toxic friends, however, often present as selfish and challenging. They may struggle with healthy communication and become aggressive, passive-aggressive, or dismissive when they don't get what they want. They may also depend on you for validation or comfort, exhibiting a range of attention-seeking behaviors.
If you feel you need your friend to give you meaning, affirmation, and purpose — in other words, you seek validation from them — it's another sign of being a toxic friend, according to Dr. Klapow. “You are not looking for a relationship that is honest; rather, one that is reinforcing all the time,” he says.
Combative (like to start fights) Rude. Mean or degrading (make you feel bad) Prone to gossip.
“Toxic friendships happen when one person is being emotionally harmed or used by another, making the relationship more of a burden than support,” says Suzanne Degges-White, author of Toxic Friendships. A bad friendship can increase your blood pressure, lower your immunity, and affect your mental health.
Psychologist Şirin Atçeken says: “An unhealthy friend is someone who is never supportive and is maliciously competitive, or uses your success to get ahead themselves. Toxic individuals can also often lie to make themselves look better than others.
If your friend doesn't respect your feelings, it's an unhealthy relationship. Feeling anxious or negative in your friendship is a sign that it may be best to end it. Your friend is dishonest or holds back information. “Deep connections require trust,” Schmitt says.
If something feels questionable or wrong, that's a warning sign of an inappropriate friendship. While it's okay to desire some unique connection, it's never healthy to feel the need to hide or protect the relationship from your partner.
Neuroticism, because of its links to negative affect and reactivity (Lahey, 2009), often contributes to higher levels of interpersonal conflict (Harris & Vazire, 2016) . ...
Things You Should Know
Friendship red flags include: When a friend insults you, belittles you, or downplays your achievements. A friend making everything all about themself and only coming to you when they need a favor.
A toxic friend will have a hard time sharing you with other friends and tend to get really jealous when you're with other people. A toxic person shifts blame and tries to put a wedge between you and your existing friendships.
The four behaviours are Blaming, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. Relationship expert Dr John Gottman termed these "The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" as they spell disaster for any personal or professional relationship.
The Leech. This type of friend always needs you and expects you to drop everything when they call. While it is important to be a supportive friend, with this type of friend, you have to set boundaries. If you do not, after a while, this type of friend will drain your energy and your time.
A healthy friendship should be two-sided, with both people giving and receiving. In a toxic relationship, one person feels more invested. They feel they are always the way to compromise and may even feel taken advantage of by the other person.