Toxic people prey on your insecurities – they'll make you feel good about yourself while also pulling you down, so they can feel good about themselves. This helps them control you – the constant praising you and then criticizing you helps them brainwash you, so you never know which way is up.
Many empaths have previously been targets of narcissists or other toxic people. They are hugely attractive to this group of people. Why? Empaths feel what others are feeling, including toxic people, and they respond to make that person's life better –that is, until they have awakened.
You Have Low Self-Esteem
If you find toxic behavior acceptable, it may be due to a case of low self-esteem. That's because, as Trescott tells me, being with someone who is rude or mean doesn't make you feel much worse than you already do.
Why do good people find themselves stuck in toxic relationships? Therapists often speak of something called “love addiction,” where a person craves the sense of fulfillment and validation that comes from being in a relationship, no matter how destructive.
People with toxic traits know they have them
It's natural to assume someone's bad behavior is a conscious choice. But many people with toxic traits don't realize that their behavior impacts others. You may have toxic traits that you don't know about. Some toxic traits, like absolutism, manifest subtly.
“There can be a real grieving process when cutting off a toxic family member,” says MacMillan. “Grief that the relationship is not working, especially if it once did. Recognizing this process takes time and cutting yourself a little slack when it comes to self-judgment is key.”
Real love cannot happen in a toxic relationship.
You must first cleanse your relationship before you can even think of finding true love within it. But sometimes that isn't possible. Relationships are always difficult. Two people have to merge their lives and validate each other's decisions.
It could be because of your reputation, especially if you're popular at your school, workplace, etc. Another reason could be that you have desirable traits, such as intelligence or the ability to lead. It could also be because you allow people to step on you, so people see no harm in using you for their own benefit.
All too often, men find themselves stuck in toxic relationships due to various factors such as low self-esteem, fear of commitment, and lack of education about healthy relationships.
A toxic person is anyone whose behavior adds negativity and upset to your life. Many times, people who are toxic are dealing with their own stresses and traumas. To do this, they act in ways that don't present them in the best light and usually upset others along the way.
Often empaths are targeted by sociopaths because they pose the greatest threat. The empath is usually the first to detect that something is not right and express what s/he senses.
Someone with narcissistic tendencies will be able to identify others who will allow them to be dominant in the relationship. This means that if they see you as someone who will be overly accommodating to their needs, will allow them to be in control, they will be more attracted to you.
An curved arrow pointing right. Empaths and narcissists are often drawn to each other. This is because empaths have a lot of compassion and understanding to give, while narcissists thrive on someone worshipping them.
Emotional connection is another reason why people may feel drawn to each other. An emotional connection may help create a sense of trust and support in a relationship, making it feel natural and providing a sense of safety; therefore, it is possible to feel more drawn to a person.
Some people gravitate toward needy individuals because they need to feel needed. People who are insecure or have low self-esteem may find themselves drawn to these types of people as well. When these two types of people join into a partnership, it often turns into codependency.
Research has demonstrated that we are often attracted to partners who seem familiar to us and have similar qualities to our parents. One of the reasons people are drawn to emotionally unavailable partners is due to the role models they had for romantic relationships in childhood.
Attachment can become toxic if you rely too much on others to satisfy emotional needs. The goal of healthy emotional attachment is finding a balance between getting your emotional needs met by yourself and by others. Find a supportive therapist that can help with anxiety.
Toxic relationships generally follow three stages: idealizing, devaluing, and discarding. Learn about each of these stages and the impact it has on you.
It can be related to childhood traumas or variations of abuse at any age. When pain is all you know, it can be challenging to seek alternative behaviors. There's also the instances in which we are blinded by love. It's easy to get caught up in a relationship, even when it's toxic.
This doesn't mean you have to interact with them, but people aren't born “toxic” and generally get that way from observing such behavior in the home as a child or experiencing abuse. Setting healthy relationship boundaries with toxic people is essential, although it can be very challenging.