While you won't get any closure, consider yourself lucky if it happens. More often, the narcissist will go silent for some period of time, and then return as if nothing happened. They may have found a new source of supply but had a falling out with them and now they need something from you.
Research has found that people who received the silent treatment experienced a threat to their needs of belonging, self-esteem, control, and meaningful existence. This type of behavior reinforces the feeling that someone we care about wants nothing to do with us. It can feel as though you don't exist.
If you ignore a narcissist and deny them their source, they may become enraged and try even harder for your attention – especially in ways that can be toxic or abusive. Ignoring a narcissist will enrage them because of their fragile egos. They'll feel humiliated and lash out against you to protect themselves.
The silent treatment can last for hours, days, weeks or months. Some people do this because they are genuinely hurt and unable to speak. When they do feel able to talk, it'll be a two-way conversation. A narcissist uses the silent treatment to punish you.
One of the main reasons why a narcissist ignores you is that they want to control you. More likely, they want to regain control of you. A narcissist uses ignoring people as a way to punish them. Especially if they feel like you are pulling away.
Narcissists may use the silent treatment to communicate they are unhappy with you, to control you, or as a form of punishment. If the narcissist uses the silent treatment to deflect responsibility for something they have done wrong, it can also be a form of narcissistic gaslighting.
It is to make the victim acquiesce to self-erasure and scramble to meet the needs of their abuser, however unhealthy or damaging those may be. Moreover, it is a form of intermittent reinforcement that causes the victim to walk on eggshells.
The silent treatment might be employed by passive personality types to avoid conflict and confrontation, while strong personality types use it to punish or control. Some people may not even consciously choose it at all.
So, one clear answer to how long should the silent treatment last is to not let it stretch for days, weeks or months. If you hold off communication in a bid to get your partner to submit to your will or apologize, then you're venturing into the tricky territory of silent treatment and emotional abuse.
But here is the rub: Over time, the narcissist usually senses that you are pulling away, and it is then that your problems take on a different form. Narcissists hate feeling that they might be rejected or that you might conclude that they are defective. So, they go into compensation mode by turning the tables.
Breakups with narcissists don't always end the relationship. Many won't let you go, even when it's they who left the relationship, and even when they're with a new partner. They won't accept “no.” They hoover in an attempt to rekindle the relationship or stay friends after a breakup or divorce.
Well, silence can be a powerful tool when dealing with a narcissist. If they are used to dominating the conversation, silence can make them uncomfortable. You can force them to confront their behavior and make them fear you by remaining silent.
At the end of a relationship, a narcissist will often spiral down a long-winded gauntlet of manipulation tactics. They may blame you for causing the relationship to fail, work hard to keep you to stay with them, make lofty promises to change their behavior, or badmouth you to everyone around them.
Ultimately, when you learn how to get out of a narcissistic relationship, the narcissist is shocked. They believed that they had complete control over you, and they never thought you'd leave. When you cut off contact, they may chase after you, desperately trying to get you back under their control.
Indifference & Apathy. One of the clearest signs of narcissistic discard is indifference. The narcissist might suddenly seem cool, aloof, and apathetic towards someone who they've already decided to discard.
If you were to use the silent treatment against the narcissist in your life, you would be making it very easy for them to manipulate you into a negative interaction because you wouldn't be making conscious and well-informed decisions.
Silence keeps the abuse intact. One of the tactics a narcissist will use in the beginning (or really, at any time of a relationship), is the tactic to keep you silent. Abusers groom their target with the purpose to manipulate for their benefit.
A narcissist will ignore you for as long as it serves them. There are a few things you need to understand. A narcissist is driven, consciously or subconsciously, by the need for narcissistic supply. The narcissist is inherently lazy and will seek maximal supply for minimal effort.