INFJs enjoy delving into rich human experiences and shared feelings. They love authentic conversation where both they and the person they are speaking with are able to divulge their fears, weaknesses, joys, ideas, failures, and successes.
Loyalty is not only a quality that INFJs are attracted to, but also something they expect to find in a future partner. Once again, it all comes down to trust. For an INFJ, loyalty means more than 'not cheating'. It means someone who supports you and makes an effort to truly understand you.
INFJs are looking for not just physical intimacy, but emotional intimacy. They don't want an “instagram relationship” where their partner only tells them what they want to hear or what looks good on paper. They want vulnerability, honesty, and deep understanding.
These individuals value authenticity in themselves and others, placing this high on their priority list. They appreciate people who are true to themselves and are not afraid to show their vulnerabilities. INFJs usually feel happiest when they can be themselves and are accepted and appreciated for who they are.
Since INFJs appreciate quality time with you, ask them about their day and spend time with them. When they ask for help, be there. And let them know you love them, but you can show it and not always say it. To this point, thoughtful gestures go a long way.
When I surveyed INFJs about their flirting styles, more than anything, they expressed a deep desire to connect emotionally with someone they liked. They will be more emotionally open, express more of their deeper longings, and become more vulnerable with you if they like you.
INFJs' Two Favorite Love Languages
There are five different love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, or Physical Touch. From what I've seen online and the INFJs I've talked with, Quality Time and Words of Affirmation are the two most popular love languages for INFJs.
Communication takes precedence – the idea being that with open and honest communication, almost any other challenge can be navigated – but other things that INFJs need to be satisfied in a relationship include respect (especially for their Ni insights), semi-regular expression of love/affirmation, willingness from ...
They Encourage You and Notice Your Positive Strengths
It's important for them to make someone they love feel appreciated, uplifted, and inspired to embrace what makes them unique. INFJs might do this in a one-on-one conversation, in writing, or even just through the “vibe” they give off.
Exercising alone is helpful, and some INFJs find great solace in nature. Other stress busters include light reading, writing in a journal or meditation.
True vulnerability may be challenging at first, so INFJs need partners who can be patient until trust is built in the relationship. The feelings of those closest to them, including romantic partners, are like an open book to INFJs and they tend to assume that others can see into their hearts just as easily.
INFJs are most likely to marry someone who shares their values and vision for the future, regardless of their personality type. INFJs are more likely to marry someone who values emotional depth and intimacy and is dedicated to personal growth and development.
Therefore, when looking for a romantic partner, INFJ personalities are usually attracted to people who share their enthusiasm for knowledge and make the INFJ feel seen. An ideal partner for an INFJ doesn't have to love the same music or books they do, but they must be a great conversationalist.
INFJ: Superficiality
Superficial conversations about gossipy topics or small talk don't usually interest an INFJ, so it can be a major turn-off when someone is too eager to stick to the surface level of communication. Shallow conversations and frivolous topics can make an INFJ feel bored, disconnected, and uninspired.
Because of our passionate need for meaningful connection, we INFJs can get jealous easily when we see other people connecting and having fun. We might compare ourselves to them, or worse yet, when someone close to us has friends of their own, we might pull away, feeling unwanted and pathetic.
You attract an INFJ by listening to them; without trying to come up with solutions. Although advice can be very helpful at times, sometimes, listening intently really helps more. LIstening helps validate the emotions of people and show how attentive and aware you are. But also that you're present.
At their best, INFJs make modest, reliable teammates, and allow others to take the lead. INFJs may undervalue their own needs, ideas, and contributions, acting overly shy and not taking credit when due. At their worst, INFJs can be excessively submissive, ineffectual, and too dependent on direction from others.
People are high-fiving, cheering, and otherwise overdoing it emotionally. As an INFJ you tend to feel out-of-your-element in these situations. You might attempt to cheer only to be taken aback by the awkward tension and self-consciousness in your voice.
If an INFJ gets personal with you about their emotions and life details, it means they like you and want you to be interested in them. They will share things about their life, family, and dreams. Once they can trust you, they will even express their deep emotions about people and situations.
She'll be interested in her partner's passions, no matter how different they are from hers. This act of selflessness can really endear others to INFJs, which is why the best match for INFJ males or females is anyone who can reciprocate the same.
INFP is the type most commonly mistaken for INFJ, and they use Ne as their co-pilot process. If Signs 1 and 5 are both sound true for you there's a very good chance you're an INFP.
The best matches for INFJs include intuitive types such as INTJ, INFP, and ENFJ. INFJs are the least compatible with sensors, especially ESTJs, ESTPs, and ESFPs. INFJ-INFJ relationships can be emotionally fulfilling yet difficult if both INFJs aren't willing to openly discuss relationship problems.
INFJs are incredibly loyal, and when they love, they love more deeply and fiercely than even they can fathom; they desperately want the people in their life to feel appreciated. However, this behavior can backfire, as constant communication and “How are you doing? Are you doing OK?” can be seen as clingy.