For the person on the receiving end, someone experiencing a narcissistic collapse may look out of control, extremely angry, and vindictive. In some cases, it may look like someone withdrawing altogether and giving them the silent treatment.
A person experiencing a narcissistic collapse may engage in impulsive, risky behaviors such as excessive drinking or substance abuse, unprotected sex, rage outbursts, or self-harm. Narcissists are already prone to impulsive behavior.
Narcissistic collapse occurs when a narcissist's ability to uphold their grandiose, confident image is threatened. As a result, they often become enraged, resulting in impulsivity, intense lashing out, or harm to others.
When this type of narcissist collapses, it feels like you're "walking on eggshells" with them, according to Malkin. They may burst into tears or have a bad attitude they don't try to hide. But instead of explaining why they feel this way, they'll stonewall you, said Malkin.
Triggering the narcissistic collapse
Someone or something that threatens their image and their false reality triggers narcissistic collapse. Triggers may be mild or extreme. The trigger causes the narcissist's self-defense mechanisms to break down.
For the person on the receiving end, someone experiencing a narcissistic collapse may look out of control, extremely angry, and vindictive. In some cases, it may look like someone withdrawing altogether and giving them the silent treatment.
The narcissist often engages in self-defeating and self-destructive behaviours.
Narcissists can feel emotional pain, but not usually in the same way as others. The emotional pain they may feel is usually related to underlying selfish needs. Underneath the displays of superiority and sense of entitlement, they often feel empty, powerless, and shameful, which they perceive as weakness.
He is the person most insensitive to his true needs. The narcissist drains himself of mental energy in this process. This is why he has none left to dedicate to others. This fact, as well as his inability to love human beings in their many dimensions and facets, ultimately transform him into a recluse.
Narcissistic silent treatment is when a narcissist ignores and avoids interacting with you to punish, control, or communicate that they are unhappy with you. It's a form of manipulation, and this toxic behavior can negatively impact the victim psychologically and emotionally.
Grooming a person, manipulating her into doubting her feelings, generating shame regarding her best qualities, and manipulatively creating dependency are four ways a narcissist destroys a person from the inside out.
Mental Breakdown
Narcissistic Collapse is generally permanent – the narcissist never recovers for the rest of their life.
According to Julie L. Hall, author of “The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free,” narcissists become more extreme versions of their worst selves as they age, which includes becoming more desperate, deluded, paranoid, angry, abusive, and isolated.
The Narcissistically Injured/Deflated Narcissist:
The narcissistically injured, hereafter referred to as the deflated narcissist, is someone who embraces shame but, this narcissism comes from the rigidity with which the individual tells the story.
Symptoms Of An Aging Narcissist
Inflated sense of self-importance. Need for constant admiration and attention. Lack of empathy for others. Tendency to take advantage of others.
They tend to get very aggressive, increasingly agitated, become anxious or may become vindictive towards whoever they feel caused the setback they're angry at. Many narcissists tend to self-harm or start turning to addictions when they experience a narcissistic collapse.
Breaking up with a narcissist is likely to be a draining experience. Either they won't let you go without a fight, or they will discard you without looking back. Both experiences are extremely hurtful.
They're often introverted, sensitive, and prone to experiencing anxiety and shame. They may also struggle to maintain close friendships as they focus heavily on themselves, require attention, and are hyper-sensitive to perceived criticism.
Understanding the condition better can help you manage your expectations and give yourself permission to prioritize your needs. While most people with NPD are not aware that they are narcissists, it's important to remember that no abuse is acceptable or excusable.
The most effective weapon to fend off narcissists is self-love. When you love yourself, it is more difficult for the narcissist to manipulate you and get under your skin. It will hurt them to know that you do not need them, that you are better off without them, and that you love yourself exactly as you are.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
In turn, the changes in the brain can increase the risk for chronic stress, PTSD, and symptoms of self-sabotage. Individuals who are in recovery after a relationship with a narcissistic partner describe feelings of confusion, procrastination, low self-esteem, fear of failure, and worthlessness.
Though typical narcissists do not discard people because they crave attention, covert narcissists may go to extreme measures to permanently discard you.
Discard/Rejection: When the narcissist gets bored or decides the person is no longer useful enough to them, they'll often end the relationship and 'discard' the person. Sometimes, this ending is final. Other times, a narcissist will use hoovering to lure the person back into the relationship and repeat the cycle.
Much of the time, a narcissist's behaviour isn't driven by self-love – rather, self-hatred.