When you have a crush on someone, the levels of dopamine in your body are elevated, causing feelings of both exhilaration and anxiety. See, you can thank dopamine for the way that your heart beats out of your chest and your hand trembles when you try to talk to her.
It starts with a crush
That first spark of attraction ignites a region buried deep inside the brain called the ventral tegmental area, or VTA. Recognizing a potential reward in the making, the VTA begins producing a chemical called dopamine, often called the “feel-good” neurotransmitter.
Psychologically speaking, crushes occur when a person of any age projects their ideas and values onto another person whom they believe possesses certain attributes and with whom they want to be associated. Then, the person with the crush attaches strong positive feelings to this magical image that they have created.
The most common sign of having a crush is the feeling that you have a million butterflies flying around inside you when that special someone is around. It can also feel like your heart does a leap when you see your crush and you feel warm and giddy. Do you suddenly feel nervous but excited at the same time?
It can last hours, days, weeks, months, or perhaps, even years; there is no set timeframe for a crush. A crush is a fantasy of what you imagine that person to be like—you like the idea of that person.
Crushes are healthy!
On the flip side, an unhealthy infatuation is not recommended. An infatuation is different than a crush because, with a crush, you have enough data about the person to know who they are, whether this means you have personally spent time with them or you know someone who has.
First crushes may occur at any time, but generally start at around 10-13 years of age. They are an important step in developing normal and healthy romantic relationships, and provide opportunities to learn how to compromise and communicate.
Crushes are About Projection
One way to look at crushes from a psychological perspective is that they are all about projection. When you crush on someone, you imagine the best things you wish about them. This is why you need not know the person very well to crush on them.
Obsessing over a crush floods our brains with feel-good hormones, so it can be “a little addictive,” she says, and a hard habit to break. However, over-indulging in fantasy is not so great for a number of reasons, and it can be helpful to remind yourself of that next time you start fixating on someone.
That's because feelings of a crush and feelings of love release the mood-boosting hormones dopamine and oxytocin to the brain, Stephanie Cacioppo, an assistant professor of psychiatry and behavioral neuroscience at The University of Chicago, told INSIDER.
Romantic chemistry focuses on characteristics present between two people, including mutual interests, similarity, and intimacy. According to Kelly Campbell, P.h.D., the more present these characteristics are, the more likely two individuals will perceive chemistry between each other.
The three stages include lust, attraction and attachment.
They found 55 percent of people fall in love for the first time between the ages of 15 and 18. So it's more than half, but that means 45 percent of people still haven't been in love when they enter college. Here's what else they learned about the age we first fall in love.
No need to wait for the official first date to get a little face time, however. Americans agree kids are ready for their first kiss at age 15 (15.1 on average), while on average, they had theirs at age 14.5.
The agony a crush can cause is pretty universal. If you never tell your crush how you feel, you may not face actual rejection. But it still hurts when your hopes come to nothing. Fortunately, crushes usually don't last long, although you might feel like you'll be miserable forever.
A crush can quickly turn toxic if the other person is constantly criticizing you and judging your every move. And when this happens, it's easy to feel desperate and crave their praise and approval the more they withhold it.